Motivation, dreams, hopes and movie magic
Warning: Text-heavy post ahead, maybe also a bit depressing, heh.
Lots of thoughts started flowing in after I watched a movie tonight and I felt like I had to write them down somewhere, so here they are.
We all enjoy watching a show or a movie from time to time.
We explore the characters’ world, learn their views and connect with them.
This ability to relate with other people, be them real or fictional, is a big part of what makes us human. Empathy allows us to see what others see, feel what others feel and grow as people learning from those interactions.
When we see someone with their mind set on a dream, willing to do whatever is in their hands to make it a reality, we are compelled to root for them and we want to see how it ends.
Movies make this very easy by keeping our attention on this character’s journey towards that dream until it either succeeds, or it fails, but after that… what happens? Where does the story go after the end credits roll?
These characters and stories are often designed in a way that puts the focus on this one specific dream and casts aside all others, so we never get to see the character’s other aspirations in life. This means that once they either achieve their dream or fail at it, there’s nothing for us to root for going forward and we get this “void” we often feel at the end of movies. A satisfactory one, but also slightly bitter.
In real life, however, no matter how much we want to support a person on their journey to make their dream a reality, we don’t get to follow them anywhere as closely and it’s not condensed into a two hour-long montage.
Most people don’t have this really tight-knit group of friends that’d do anything for each other, or even better, one where these friends want to pursue their dream with them and see the story to its end.
Don’t get me wrong, though, over the years I’ve seen some groups of really close friends — they do exist, they’re just rare.
Most people’s friends are supportive, but don’t usually share the same aspirations or are willing to go out of their way to make someone else’s dream become true when they could be achieving theirs.
Among regular groups of friends, it’s not always easy to find a unifying sense of direction either. One path they all want to follow, each on their own or together. Furthermore, some people don’t even have clear dreams and hopes, big or small.
Individuals with dreams and aspirations but noone to join them in their journey are all too common, and tend to end up ditching their initial goals in pursue of something that’ll just allow them to get by.
Every day everyone walks past someone in the street who would shares their dreams and would love to see them succeed, but what are the chances they’ll talk to each other without knowing that? What are the chances they even know the other person exists?
When they do have a group of friends, people tend to get comfortable and stop going out to explore, meet and get to know others. They don’t want to ditch their current friends because they found someone else because after all, they’re their friends, right?
All of this prevents them from finding like-minded individuals who share their passion or would at least be willing to provide some sort of continued support on their journey, which results in demotivation, loss of hope and, at the end, that dream never becoming a reality.
I’ve met many people over the years — most of them online — who I felt this sort of connection with. I want to see them succeed, they want to see me succeed, but there’s a very big difference between expressing support over text chat and the human interactions involved in doing so in person.
I feel like if those people were near me, maybe even an hour or two away by train, and I was able to have those much more real interactions with them, both me and them would feel a lot more encouraged to keep going until the end.
This has been the main reason I haven’t been too active in the modding scene over the past couple of years, also a big part of why I haven’t really streamed, and why I sometimes disappear from some places for a few days.
It’s not so much burnout as it is not finding a reason to keep going.
I know there’s someone out there who wants to see things through to the end, but that doesn’t really help because I don’t feel a real connection with them.
It’s also part of why I keep switching projects and can’t work on a single thing for too long, the other being that if I’m not learning, I’m not having fun, so I’d rather not be doing it.
Anyway, that’s a good chunk of my thoughts written as cohesively as I could at 2:30AM on a weekday with very few hours of sleep the night before.
Thank you Vazkii for letting me write this sort of stuff to you on Discord on a regular basis as it comes to my mind, and thank you to everyone who’s ever supported me in any way. I really do appreciate it, and I hope we can one day turn that into a more real connection.
Also if anyone is wondering what movie I watched, it was Love Live! The School Idol Movie, but this happens pretty much every time I watch any movie and in some cases also regular shows :P