In Real Life (IRL)
I’m currently sitting on the bus in transit, commuting home from work, writing this in the Notes app on my phone because I’m such a dummy. The online coaching I’ve been doing requires… well, being online, but the implications have only hit me these last couple of months after being charged data overages. Now that I’ve turned off my data to prevent further unnecessary billing, I only have text messages and calling. Ah, the good ol’ days of cellphone use, not this mini computer business.
I’ll be honest with ya. I’ve tapped on the red “1” badge on my Facebook app one too many times out of pure habit, not even realizing that I have no internet connection until it tells me so. I just can’t help myself. It’s no wonder I’ve used up all of my data this month! Tap, tap, tap, tap. It’s so quick, so easy. It’s so mindless that it doesn’t take much to get sucked into the black hole of social media, spending hours scrolling and scrolling for no reason whatsoever. The technology these days is so amazing, even overwhelming, but we rely on it far too much to the point that a moment without it is crippling.
As we speak, I’m typing this out on my phone rather than writing it down on a piece of paper. More and more, we’re choosing convenience over reason. I’ve even glanced at my battery percentage, which, at this point, is completely irrelevant. I should be reading the book I’m trying to finish and yet I’m here, gripping my phone for dear life, knowing I can live without it but don’t want to. Don’t tell me you haven’t had a mini freak out when you’ve reached for your phone and it wasn’t exactly where you thought it was!
We’re so used to having all information available to us right at our fingertips, almost anywhere we go and instantly, and when it’s taken away from us, we feel lost and naked. Who won the Superbowl in 1986? Google it! Is a liger real? Wikipedia will tell you! What’s this song that’s playing? Shazam it! Wasn’t that guy in that movie? Look up his filmography in IMDB! We’re spoiled and often self-entitled — there’s really no nice way of putting it. When we lose our cellphone, our internet isn’t working, or the battery on our laptop dies, we’re paralyzed and disoriented. What do we do now? How will we possibly know how good a restaurant is if we can’t read reviews or see their menu ahead of time? How will I know what street to turn on? Here’s an idea, use a map! Or better yet, ask someone! Remember the dictionary? Yeah, that still exists. The telephone? Yep, that too. We know how to use these things, but we don’t because we “just don’t want to” or because it’s “harder” for some reason.
I don’t believe it’s an internet addiction per se, but perhaps the need to feel connected. Through the overuse of technology that is meant to bring us together, we’re losing the humanity that made us crave the connection to begin with. The funny thing is, we would be connected if we just put down our technology and interacted with the people around us in real life, face to face, through audial, visual, and non-visual communication, not via text or social media.
We’ve even gotten to the point of creating tech-specific terms and slang, only to be used when we’re behind a screen. How often do you actually laugh out loud when you type “lol”? My guess is never. “In real life” has been abbreviated to “irl” for faster typing. Would you actually say “irl” to someone in person? No, because you would already be in the real life and there would be no reason to say it. “Emoji” is even listed as a language for when people want to express themselves with icons, rather than voices, faces, and body language. In what ways do you express yourself now, compared to how you did years ago, when the internet wasn’t the beast that it is today?
Ever wonder why we seem to be so much more stressed out as adults? Sure, there are bills and work and kids, but did you ever think it’s maybe also partly because we are no longer revelling in the same simple pleasures as we did when we were younger? I remember fondly the days when I used to come home from school and couldn’t wait to finish my homework so that I could go to the park and play with my friends. We’d run around the playground and get dirty, ride our bikes around the neighborhood, knocking on friends’ doors and sitting on their doorsteps eating popsicles from the Dicky Dee. No care in the world, and it was wonderful. If someone got a new pair of shoes, we’d see them enough to witness them wear them and tell them in person they were cool, instead of sit behind a computer and click on a button that says “Like”, never actually speaking to the person.
Friending a random on social media is such a strange concept. You make a request, they accept, and you see each other’s lives but may not have ever taken the time to actually get to know each other, virtually or “irl”. Why are we so awkward about having a conversation, even just saying “hello”? It might seem weird and suspicious to some people to send them a message out of the blue or ask them to meet up after so long, but to me, what’s weirder is that we don’t. When was the last time you even typed out a simple “Hey, how are you?” to one of your contacts, much less catch up with them over coffee or a bite? How many Facebook friends and Instagram followers do you have who you share your best and worst times with, what you’re eating, who you’re with, where you are, and yet you haven’t spoken to them in years, if ever?
The Information Age has turned into the Unsatisfied Age, always looking for more when we have more than enough, multitasking non-stop when we can’t even give one thing our all, wanting more connections when we don’t nurture relationships we already have, lonely while we’re with someone. Sometimes less is more. Losing attachment to technology can mean gaining freedom and perspective. We need to start being more mindful of how lucky we are to have what we have, and to fully experience the moments, not just document them. Log off, turn it off, put it away, and don’t touch it. Be present, be in it, go all in. Live your life instead of watching it happen!
Practice makes progress:
Go for a walk, out for dinner with no TVs, a picnic, museum, or anything at all, for just one hour without your phone or computer. Be 100% in the moment. Was your experience any different than it would have been if you had your phone or camera on you? How many times did you reach for it without thinking?
Originally published at gluttonforgrowth.wordpress.com on February 24, 2017.
