Just the quick sand that appears as if it’s a hard wood floor, just the viscous muck that I step through to make a cup of coffee, just the unsolid ground that pulls my foot deep into it’s bottomless hole, just the polished grains and planks that fall and sink as I walk along, that’s all. Just the alarm that rings in my ear to wake me suddenly, just the tone that softly repeats even though I was never really asleep, just the quiet reminder to get up, move, become human again, just the unnecessary notice of a new day and sun and possibilities, that’s all. Just the same streets that I know naked and blind folded, just the same avenues that must be traveled for business and school, just the route to a familiar place that I avoid, just the awful gravel and water that made the solid surface that swallows me at each turn, that’s all. Just the same voice in my head that is never too loud, just the over wrought conversation that flows between each ear, just the same look to see if it was an illusion or my mind, just the same conclusion each time, the ending that never changes course. Just the urge to sprint away each time I see an opening, just the way I need to run when my heart can’t rebound, just the siren of purgetory that plagues if I stay, just the wonder in escape that both of us continueously seek and never find, that’s all. Just the sadness that prevents joy in anything, just the way sorrow makes me who I am and who I can’t escape, just knowing that you follow my every electronic move but stay on the other side. Just the gut wrenching reality that I was just another Amber. That’s all.