I’m Scared to Write

I lack courage and discipline. Uncompleted articles sit in draft stage for weeks to months to years.

I have no problem writing for school or business. That is a challenge I love — the challenge of producing excellent work.

Writing for personal production . . . is another story. I use procrastination as a buffer covering up my feelings of inadequacy.

Who would want to read my work let alone care about my perspectives?

That was me, all in my head, negative self-talk. I was telling myself my writing was not worthy, and my actions showed it.

Why should I complete an article if no one sees it?

It’s hard to accept your own writing and deem it is valid for consumption by others, “comparison is the thief of joy,” and when we produce things, we can reside too deeply in self-consciousness finding ourselves unable to validate the creation and execution of our own musings.

It’s even harder coming to the truth that we writers are often self-absorbed and think that this writing is about us. Our audience becomes our bottom-line and we want them for relevance nothing more.

It becomes about getting seen and wanting people to see it because they make us feel important. Which only further fuels our feelings of inadequacy despite the facade because any confidence built on outside interactions is not confidence at all.

In the past few weeks, I began to get real honest with myself as a writer. I interrogated the why for my articles and need for thought production.

In short, I realized that I write because I had something to say.

Therefore if you can’t find anyone to care about or engage with your writings — you do it yourself. You read and reread what you post and learn how to evolve into a better writer.

Give yourself praise for a poignant sentence and authentic expression. Track where you’ve come from and how you’ve evolved in your creative thought production. Critique your ability to be clear yet holistically capture your topic. Most importantly, discipline yourself to complete articles you care about.

Don’t write what you think someone will like — write what you’re passionate about, write about your experiences, and the words will never stop flowing.

If you see yourself in this article, know you’re not alone.

Even more importantly take responsibility for the fear, self-importance, and get honest with yourself.

The root of the feeling of inadequacy is you, no matter how you spin it. Inner confidence outshines validation from others and is authentic and lined with humility.

If you love writing, get real and hold yourself accountable to produce work at your intersection of time, space, and identity.

Corny and cliché as it is, no one is like you or has your perspective. Don’t leave a group of seekers hanging because you are too self-conscious to find confidence in yourself and worth in your words.

They need to hear them.

. . . I write and how I’ve done so is in order to save my own life. — Barbara Christian