I don’t live in Walla Walla anymore

Ame Nielsen
Aug 23, 2017 · 2 min read

It’s still very strange that I don’t live in Walla Walla. We have been in Richland for 11 weeks now.

It feels very very strange.

We went from living in a county of 60k people to a city of 54k and a county of 190k. Things move a bit faster here, there is a lot more to do here and I can go to the store and not run into people I know.

I feel lost though, new stores, new doctors, new streets, new places and nothing is familiar. I have never used my GPS on my phone as much as I do now. I have had to use it to take Lane to a park for crying out loud. I miss the familiarity of Walla Walla.

The simple thing of not knowing where things are in your local stores bothers me. It’s like being on vacation and just getting what you can wherever you can find it because you have no clue where anything is.

I have pushed a lot of these feelings aside to ensure that Lane feels comfortable and knows that all of this newness is a good thing. In doing this I have not dealt with how I have felt and things have come crashing down. The worst of the bad funk I was in has passed (I hope) but it wasn’t good when it was happening. Not leaving the house, not getting dressed and doing the absolute minimal day in and day out was my life for a bit.

I don’t feel great, in fact I feel like running away most days but I pull it all together and do what I am supposed to do everyday. Some days are better than others and lately the good days are outnumbering the bad ones. Joining the gym is a step in pulling things together as is writing and sharing how I am feeling with others around me. I am not one to ask for help or to say that I am struggling and I really need to stop doing that.

Here’s to more good days.

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