This is high school essay (maybe junior high) level writing and “analysis.” How juvenile and self indulgent can you get? Hey guess what. Everyone experiences grief and some of us don’t blame it on depression, and use the health care system as an excuse for not dealing with it. Only thing missing here is blaming mommy and daddy for your problems. The not-so-subtle undercurrent here is “pity me, I’m a victim,” and an indictment of your girlfriend for taking care of herself. She’s lucky she got away from your life sucking energy and if she takes you back, shame on her. Good luck gaining maturity and self awareness. You will need it.