And she will be loved….
Totally collapsing failing to endure a new heart break, losing sight of what she is doing wrong or what is going on overall, having no clue how to express what she is going through, unconsciously she records a voice note to her best friend, luckily a talented writer asking her to write her story for her. She told her I need to see what’s happening to me on paper, I need it to be vivid and clear to share it with others maybe I can manage to find help when things are framed in front of me.
Her best friend understood her friend couldn’t talk, had to energy or even clarity of mind to explain what she’s going through, so she decided to give her space to heal and help her in the way she requested. She decided her pen and notepad will be her rescue method to her best friend whom she couldn’t bear standing still paralyzed unable to even offer her a hand to get her out of this vicious cycle of heart aches and self-doubt. So she decided she’ll pour her all what she wants to pass to her through her other best friend, her notepad and pen.
With no prior preparation, she grabs her pen and leaves the words to start flooding on her notepad writing down what her friend has been going through for the past 3 years:
She believed in love deeply moving with this faith in every step in her life. In every relationship she went through, she always had this faith driving her behavior naively assuming others lived with the same faith and moved with the same values she display, yet life was never like that!
She had no clue why every guy she met was behaving vaguely getting her lost in their confusing actions, unjustified steps, and unexpected reactions that took her nowhere but to more confusing areas in her mind engraving deeper wounds in her heart and greater emptiness in her soul. Those experiences drove her into a vigorous cycle of self-doubt and questioning of her faith and belief in love.
This unstable phase kept her rolling over and over in emotional roller coasters along with the ones who loved her and could relate deeply with her emotions, all unable to detect what was going wrong. Fed up of this unmerciful phase, she surrendered to the idea of letting go, losing control, and leaving things to happen. She did so at the expense of her own peace and identity and self-belief. She became a girl with a broken smile, a burdened heart, a wondering mind, yet an accepting soul. Even if her belief in love was shaken, yet she never stopped praying and dreaming of this love, simply because she couldn’t tolerate living without this belief even in her dreams; this belief and hope for someone who would share her dreams and life, who would help her create the most loving and peaceful family.. Even though her deprivation of those needs ached her heart, her needs of being loved and of being a mother, yet, she never gave in to the first person who knocked her door, because she could never accept to just live like others, just as machines who would marry, have kids, work, and die. She couldn’t tolerate a relationship empty of warmth and life. She did long for a unique relationship and a mature strong bond; her idea of marriage was a spiritual relationship based on mutual respect of each other’s minds, mutual acknowledgement of each other’s’ emotions and needs, and genuine desire to lift each other and help one another reach their potential. She just wanted someone who would share her dreams, hopes, and moments of joy and misery equally.
And here her friend just couldn’t’t resume writing unable to control her tears and empathy she had towards her best friend, so she moved on from the story to simple words she desperately wanted to whisper in her friend’s ears but couldn’t. So she decided to send them to her on paper as well.
“It’s coming, my dear”, she started whispering again revived by her old faith and her belief in her best friend’s self-worth, value and in God’s reward for her as a blessing for her continuous support and love for others.
“You will be loved”, her best friend joyfully uttered! Yes, you will be, but you just need to give in for the idea that the best things take time to happen”.
Filled with optimism and hope, she typed what she wrote and pressed the send button on her email.
Her hurt confused friend smiling at the sight of a new email from her best friend popping in her mail box, she opened it. While reading it, she starting uncontrollably feeling relaxed and relieved. Witnessing a new hope being born, she prayed for the right one as her reward after many tough experiences, confusions, and self-doubt. Leaning on her bed, she clicked on the song her friend attached with her letter and started murmuring the lyrics that perfectly addressed her current status.
“That’s the way it is” for Celine Dion. Repeating over and over her favorite part:
When you want it the most there’s no easy way out
When you’re ready to go and your heart’s left in doubt
Don’t give up on your faith
Love comes to those who believe it
And that’s the way it is
And that was a new phase between those 2 friends never failing to support each other. Closing her eyes, she remembered the last words her friends told her in the email she sent her as her closing ones, “Keep listening to those lyrics, my friend and stay hopeful and never ever compensate on your belief, NEVER! No matter what”.