Losing Summer

As a kid, you seem to live without a care in the world, no responsibilities thrust upon you besides, not peeing your pants, and making sure that you don’t mess up your alphabet. But as soon as you grow older, reality hits, and you’re childhood stripped away… Thinking back, I still remember some of my happiest memories as a concoction of summers. Endless sapphire skies with the sun as comforting as a blanket, every day I was whisked away by my friends into dizzying adventures and exploration of our neighborhood. It was like we were kings and queens of the world; We were invincible in that infinite moment, never being more assured in our lives. A few years later, all of that, has been replaced. Replaced with essays and worries, and questions flung to you that you don’t have answers to, each a rock, hitting heavier each time: “Where are you going to college?” “Do you have any goals in life at all?” “What about your future?” That crippling sense of 10 thousand different voices in your head. They scream out, and your mind spins. It feels as if I’m in a blizzard, weak and losing will in a never-ending storm. Of course, my whole life isn’t a frozen wasteland, or even overall, bleak. I do know there are more summer’s days to come, but none as magical or free as it once was when I was child. Already my glittering and shining kingdom cul-de-sac, has been reduced to just that, an asphalt cul-de-sac. My fellow kings and queens, my friends that I thought would never seperate, have lost touch with each other. All of us, broken and scattered like an archipelago. Nothing will ever be the same, and maybe that’s the point. It’s time to embrace the fact that I’m growing up, and that’s ok. During my childhood, in my sublime summers, my biggest problem was who would have to get water bottles for everyone. And now, it’s what I’m planning to do with the rest of my life, my future. Seeing that if I can power past the whole water-fetching debacle, I suppose I can work out the rest, because in a few years time, I’d know I had it all figured out anyways.

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