My nine year old son’s PSR rating is a .02

PSR or Post Survival Rating is issued to Naked and Afraid participants upon completion of their 21 day survival challenge. I used to joke with my nine year old that he needed to clean his room or we were going to go on the family edition. My son is not allowed to watch the show, but he does know what it is (cough, cough, cough, cough, hack). Anyway, I think of these people wrestling alligators for food, making water filtration systems out of bamboo and charcoal, crafting elaborate woven baskets for catching fish and I look at my son putting a knife in the toaster to remove a pop tart and think “What skills does he really have to survive?”

In a given survival situation my son’s top skills would be (and keep in mind these are his TOP skills):

In Skyrim he is a level 32 in Blacksmithing and Ebony armor

How does this translate to the real world? It doesn’t mean jack shit!! This means he’s going to THINK he knows how to make armor in real life, but when he realizes you can’t just walk into Fred Meyer and find a smelter he’s screwed and now wasted time and energy.

He’s watched hundreds of hours of Youtube life hacks

It would be great if he was actually looking up how to make a fire or home remedies, but most of these involve how to shoot an egg in or out of something, mold a Pepsi bottle out of jell-O, make balloon animals, etc. If the survival situation involves blending in with child carnies, he might have a chance.

He has a fidget spinner.

It looks like a Chinese star, but the only thing it actually cuts through is your parents last nerve. Why does this look like it should do so many things and does the least cool of any number of things? In a movie I can imagine someone writing in some bad ass lockpick/weapon/tool scenerio where a kid saves his family from the throws of an evil villain then dumb kids of the world thinking they can just do that too and doing more damage than if they’d just tried not to be a fidget spinner hero.

He can shoot.

One small problem here is that he has never used a real gun, just the ones on Call of Duty, the Nerf ones in the toy chest and paintball. Who’s to say he wouldn’t be a sharp shooter in RL if he’s that good in the games? I just have a tendency to believe it’s like guitar hero….just cause you win guitar hero doesn’t make you an actual rock star.

He can count.

.02