Amy Grier
Amy Grier
Sep 7, 2018 · 1 min read

In the midst of Louis C.K.’s actions and all the #MeToo revelations, I keep coming back to Randy Pausch’s The Last Lecture and his three-step method for apologizing:

  1. What I did was wrong.
  2. I feel bad that I hurt you.
  3. How do I make this better?

Pausch also says that a bad apology is worse than no apology. What’s so disheartening about admitted sexual harassers like C.K. is their inability to take full responsibility for the damage they’ve caused.

Louis C.K hasn’t even properly completed step one. “I didn’t know at the time it was wrong because I asked” shows a striking lack of empathy for those he’s hurt. Until he can manage all three steps — as any mature adult could and should — I can only believe that he’s learned nothing from what he’s done and cares little for the friends and colleagues he’s harmed.

Amy Grier

Written by

Amy Grier

Writer & freelance editor. MFA in nonfic, pianist & singer, student of Japanese. Feminist who loves JCVD movies & Jane Austen. Survivor of a Borderline mother.

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