Why do I say “Um” so much?

Day 4 of 100, writer gone rouge on video.

I was mortified by how many times I said, “um.”

I watched my video from day 3. All I heard was some words, some words, then “um.” A few words then “um.” And more “um.”

I really wanted to quit after seeing how silly I sounded.

I wondered what all that “um-ing” was about? I talked to Jesus about it, because I talk to him about most things. I don’t think I really pray. Rather I just maintain this ongoing conversation. One that likely makes me look a tad off to an onlooker.

I sat quietly with the question.

And I realized my “ums” were filler. Where I really needed to pause, I said “um.”

It made me wonder, “Where else in my life am I inadvertently adding things when I need to pause?

It’s an important question because I don’t want to mindlessly transition through the moments in my life.

I want to be present and aware.

I want to pause.

Because it’s in the pausing, that I find myself most grounded and connected to God, other people and myself.

I’m amy. A writer, trying super scary video. This article is part of my 100 day challenge to do Facebook live, once a day for 10 days straight, 10 times. (That’s my fancy way of making a 100 day goal less intimidating.)

For the first 10 days, I’m sharing what comes up when I talk to Jesus about things. It’s my way of inviting a more authentic conversation around the christian faith.

You can follow the 100 days on my Facebook page or here on Medium. You can read the kickoff article and why I’m doing this at Be Yourself.

If establishing your own “talk time” with Jesus sounds interesting to you. I’ve got a few tips to get you going-