Before I Go
I see the girl with the red hair dyed brown.
Fixate, draw me a picture of how this plays out.
Why am I at this music festival?
Pop a pill, maybe two. Went from honor roll to
Drug deals gone wrong.
Drop some acid,
smoke a blunt in the back seat
of the David Bowie look a-like’s car.
Quality chicks don’t spend time here.
Does it really matter how far I go?
Mom is a hater and Dad says the disease changed me.
Bowie clone is warm caramel
drizzled on a sundae
and I’m marshmallow innocent.
His face pressed up against mine,
smells like weed.
We have no blood,
just liquefied smoke.
I’m gonna croak sooner than I want to,
Bad girls expire like milk after two months, and sick girls
Like a page in a book no one noticed was missing.
I’m always quarantined,
Put in a box
The outside world is contagious,
I wasn’t supposed to die this way,
The Christians promised me that if I didn’t sin,
I’d live forever and here I am,
I started selling my meds last week,
I wanted to visit the Blue Grotto before I go.
Can’t swim, but drowning seems peaceful
Like being killed by my own sorrow.
I was an old newspaper to him,
Best left in the trash.
And my friends left me behind to chase their dreams,
[they didn’t know I was sick]
I’m being smothered by indifference.
Doesn’t anyone care?
The girl with the red hair dyed brown is getting raped,
it’s not like I can help.
Failed geometry, algebra,
Community college wouldn’t take me.
Maybe that’s why Grey Goose is so tasty.
“Fill me with your liquid bane instead”
[I’m dying anyway]
I can dispel apathy.