Sex Tips from Catullus
Amy Morrison
1456

Mr. Pesty,

Cruris Avem*? SURE! I love me some supple birds ;)

Now, I gotta be careful though… I can’t eat meat, especially poultry around my girl Lesbia. She has a pet sparrow. It’s like a whole thing. Whatever. I’ll be a vegetarian for love!

Corn? Is that like frumentum? Chocolate? Tomatoes? What are these magical things? Dawg, you must be a well traveled little beast. I’m mad impressed.

pax et amor, Catullus

*very rough translation “leg of the birds”