Rediscovering thyself, pursuing self actualisation, exercising self determination or self definition, haven't concluded for the term that suits my desire.
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Violence is violence and there’s no excuse for ever hitting the powerless person who depends on you for everything and trusts you to protect them.
The coping mechanisms you develop under duress as a defenseless child will never leave you and may turn you into a strange adult, keenly aware of danger, never not on high alert, and also prone to making excuses for those who hurt you.
To this day, I spend an inordinate amount of time in bathrooms as I forever equate them with safe spaces.