Create The Magic By Yourself

“I wish something special happened”, — she kept on thinking, waiting for someone to create magic around her. It seemed like she was becoming hopeless, she was loosing an ability to keep on believing that one day something special would actually happen. Maybe it did not simply seem that way, maybe it was exactly the case. What happened was good and bad at the same time.

She has realized that she could do it by herself. She could plan something. She could make something special happen. She could create her own magic. She could give herself what she was waiting for. She could do it on her own. She could. She. Could. At first, it was a revelation and such a relief, but then she stopped for a second and thought — but is this really a good thing? Is loosing your hope in others a good thing? Is doing everything yourself is a good thing? Those are tough questions.

(Un)fortunately she did not know answers to any of those questions, she did not have explanations either. She wanted some magic and she found a way to create it. This was what mattered the most. She found joy again, she reminded herself that she could be looking forward to something, she could be excited about upcoming plans. She did it herself and it was OK, because it was the only option available, and so she took the chance. She went for it. She just did. And it was magic. It was pure magic on its own.