Stop the Worry: Spend More Time Enjoying Your Life
I need to spend more time enjoying my children than worrying about them.
I have to work really hard to be present and live in the moment. I’ve got a strong tendency to worry about the future and dwell on the past. When I’m off the rails, it’s exhausting. Anxiety and worry distract and leave you feeling helpless.
Last spring I traveled to Asheville, North Carolina for an in-person retreat with my Mastermind family (I wrote about the experience and why you should join a Mastermind). One of the members of our group was going through a difficult time, both personally and professionally. Home life was hectic and major changes were happening at work.
When you meet this guy, two things are apparent — he puts his children above all else and his empathy for others is off the chart. He’s 100% present in the lives of his children, even when things around him are on fire. Our group sat listed to him converse with one of his children (around 10 years old) on the phone. When he hung up, he explained to us some drama at home was causing stress between his children and their mother. We collectively supported and reassured him that things would be fine by using stories of our own (because we’ve all been there). From afar, in a stressful situation, he was able to diffuse the situation by listening and responding to the needs of everyone. He wasn’t emotional or anxious. He could have pinpointed something in the past and placed blame. Instead, he lived in the moment and appreciated the circumstances.
Then and there I realized that it’s not only possible but necessary, to live in the moment and enjoy your children. We all have struggles in life, at home and work, but being present and having an awareness of our surroundings should always remain at the top of our priority list. It’s not easy to facilitate this mindset but without it, our life passes us by as we wade in worry. This child had the emotional compass because their father was present and attentive in their life — his actions and ability to listen paved the way. Emerson said, “With the past I have nothing to do; nor with the future. I live now.”
We can’t dwell on the past or worry about the future.
It’s not healthy nor is it productive. There is very little we can do to protect our children. Most of it is out of our control.
Don’t worry — instead, live in the moment and appreciate the currency of your children’s emotions, thoughts, and actions.