That day I felt life is not like what i thought : one fine Sunday afternoon being alone gave me thought, what am doing all the life?
Hmm, not getting anything to justify my self. What to do, i can’t lie to myself.
Recollected my childhood, when i was 3 : south Indian boy in New Delhi. Language was an huge barrier couldn’t communicate to other. Obviously no friends, no school, only doable is watching the TV and keep on thinking what i saw. I am interested in listening stories too. This things brought several point of view. Decided and sorted the good and bad what I came to know as good and bad.
May be this is stupid but that time no idea. This data driving my life.
I never cut my classes, if i want to simple never enjoyed like others but rarely I had friends who actually want to be like me. Can say studied will learnt more practically. Started to code from 9th class. Competitive mind will compete to be the best. Seen everything in the compete mindset.
At high school, there is need to be tough to survive in a such a tough environment.
Here I realized physical fitness is more important than anything, only mental ability can’t be succeed.
Trust me you can’t see lazy as well as hard worker as me😄
Built muscles it took some time but worth to say. Did some fight club 💪 in school.
What next automatically people start to follow. Being famous gives more enthusiasm. Reached 10th class, 1st time visited Tutor center for mathematics. Until that it was not place. My opponent was there for years, what next seen opponents so continue to compete but interesting this there are more people who actually rocks in mathematics.
I felt mathematics is not useful for me, honestly speaking i never used differentiation or calculus other than exam. Hmm what to do, born with defect ‘compete’.
Did some decent progress. Here got some proposals, girls looks cute at the age but mind said don’t fall back, this is not correct as per the list my mind had😕
Followed mind been tough avoided girls as usual few friends life moved. At Last board exam, 1st time felt “life is not what i thought ”. The few friends i had failed in exam😱
Felt like hell. No room for enjoyment about my good scores. They started to avoid me, yeah of course when we lose the one who won is like alien.
Anyway have to move mind said, entered to secondary education. Started to hate score marks. Parents and teachers worried about my mid term marks, score is not as much they expected but decent score with 100% practical knowledge. Some more tutor centers were added the list, rest less life. Here came to know there is big tragedy after a year, getting into college😴
Which course would life to better? So many advise so confused. At Last score is not enough for medicine, computer is the only choice.
Engineering in computers is costly. My father don’t want to spend much no other go at Last graduation college. My expectation was high but the college is not up to mark. Outdated syllabus i can code better than their practical classes and exams. No competition no life, felt no life there.
Thought of discontinue course and go for startup but again look back to family.
Reached final year college introduced coeducation. 1st time girls in my class, last bench girls usually does time pass with staff during class hours. Last bench boys usually teases lady staffs. Situation became still worst, my choices are computer lab and library.
Some days i go for other option that’s sick leave, yeah i used to develop my self in my room with old IBM pc. Worked for some startups, felt i’m back to track.
Days went well and good. 5th semester college symposium blasted all competition received most of the rewards 😊 again the same thought but in positive manner ‘life is not what i thought’. Just 1 more semester to complete my graduation. Unexpected and most interesting, hunting for job also having second thoughts about higher studies. Got offer from 3 software giants and 1 very good offer for higher studies.
My dream college, cleared interview effort and got seat. 1 week reaming to go for my dream😁
Once again i repeated the same “life is not as expected “, this time not happy manner. Because am going to reject my favorite course obviously born as elder so take the responsibility. Selected one software job.
New environment have to sustain, did my best but low pay. Did my best but after 2 increments also no much difference. Changed company now in another industry doing my higher studies “life is not as expected”. Took the snap above in beach when i recollected all this beautiful family playing and relaxing themselves.