Outgrowing My Imposter Syndrome

Shhh… don’t wake my gremlins.

Andrea Toole
Nov 25, 2019 · 7 min read

Last May, I published a story called Waking Up From Imposter Syndrome.

In it, I shared how I’d written something that I liked a lot and that it reminded me that I’m good at stuff, particularly writing. I wrote that writing makes my soul happy and feels like playtime.

Waking Up From Imposter Syndrome.

I find that imposter syndrome tends to ebb and flow. We don’t conquer our demons and then never have to deal with them again. It’s an ongoing process.

Our egos — our inner Gremlins — tend to sabotage us, especially when we’re doing well.

My Gremlins are asleep. (Shhhh.)

Without thinking about it or deliberately working on it, my imposter syndrome seems to have faded even more.

In the last several months, I’ve found new confidence and positivity. Late last week I tweeted,

Last May I wrote, “Waking Up From Imposter Syndrome” (https://buff.ly/34b2126). Last week, I noticed that I feel even better about it. Today I shared that w a friend. IS might return on occasion (ego), but I think age & experience have given me confidence to step into my light.

Here are some reasons why I think that my imposter syndrome has faded.

1. Outgrowing Imposter Syndrome

2. Working on my self

It didn’t take long after being released from my contract for me to realize that I’d sabotaged myself.

Lesson learned.

Of note: In the section heading above, I didn’t notice that I’d put a space between “my” and “self” until I was finished the first paragraph beneath it. The space wasn’t intentional, but it works, so I kept it. It’s possible that my subconscious — or whatever force is leading this piece of writing — made the deliberate decision to maintain “self” as a separate word.

The words “working on myself” are playing musically in my head to the tune of Billy Idol’s “ Dancing with myself.”

Well, there’s nothing to lose
And there’s nothing to prove, well,
Dancing a-with myself

3. Faith, and a life-changing premonition

Photo by Dyaa Eldin on Unsplash

In July, I had a dream that felt like a real vision of my future. The dream was SO vivid that it felt like there was no doubt.

This. is. going. to. happen.

I woke up with direct guidance about what to do next and what steps to take. I listened and did as told.

Premonition or not, I’ve spent every day thinking about this “dream”. Every day I daydream. I let my thoughts wander. Sometimes they wander into fantasy. Sometimes the daydreams seem to include more mundane moments. Even the imagined ordinary moments are worth appreciating.

I know that if this life change comes to pass, events won’t perfectly match my daydreams. The cast of characters will be different because I don’t know those people yet. If the people I’ve been in visions show up in real life , I can’t write the script for them. The events won’t be accurate, but even with challenges, that’s okay.

Feelings of love and positivity permeated the vision. The daydreams are full of love and positivity. That vibration keeps me going every day and has been attracting so much good stuff.

4. High vibration manifesting

I woke up with direct guidance about what to do next. I was told what steps to take. And I took them.

Clear, aligned action. Or, as Bernstein calls it, “Taking spiritually aligned action.”

I started taking actions suggested in the book before I even opened the book on my Kindle app. I began after that day in July, when I woke up from my dream.

For the past few months, my mornings have begun with meditation and journaling. After I started Super Attractor, I added mantras from the book to my morning ritual.

I wrote about my morning routine — and how it made me over-confident — here:

High vibes, positive energy, fewer worry

I’ve stopped worrying. At least, most of the time, I’ve stopped worrying. My faith is strengthened again. I feel like I know a secret that no one else knows. I feel powerful and empowered. I feel awesome. Some mornings, I exit a meditation with the thought, “I am a manifesting goddess.”

I believe in myself. I believe that I’m supported.

Coincidence?


Three days later, I applied to a job from a posting with no salary range mentioned. While extensively describing the role’s functions, the job posting did not cover everything I wrote down. For example, I wrote, “Ideal: They hire me ASAP remotely.”

There was no hint of a remote-work possibility in the job listing.

A day later — so, mid-week, the hiring manager contacted me for an interview and told me two things about the job that the job posting had not mentioned. I had written both of these things in my journal. The salary was one of them. That she was willing to hire remote was the other.

So, it seems that this stuff might work.

Age and experience have given me the confidence to step into my light. That experience includes experiencing these subtle and not-so-subtle shifts.

Do you understand “manifestation”?

Every day we’re faced with choices. We can choose to act of fear or out of love. Doing nothing is also a choice. All of these are valid and reflected in the results.

children on dock
children on dock
Image by Esther Merbt from Pixabay

What results do you want? What do you choose? It’s not easy. Doubt can affect the results we think we want, and so we get the opposite.

You don’t have to believe in it for it to be true.

Suspend your disbelief. I invite you to pretend and to dream. Put your whole Self into it. Play. Imagine, “What if.” Be joyful about it. Surrender to the possibility. Then, tell me if changes have occurred.

Some things won’t be possible. Someone with an undergrad degree in philosophy is unlikely to become an astronaut unless they go back to school for a new academic career. However, so much is possible.

Remember — your dream might seem like something that can only happen to other people, but ask yourself, “Why not me??”


Join my email list to get notified of new posts and other free resources as they’re created.
(By clicking, you agree to leave Medium.com and submit your contact information, which will not be shared.)

Andrea Toole

Written by

Digital Marketing Manager | Freelance Writer | Available for hire. http://andreawrites.ca. I mostly separate my ‘Jew’ from ‘Woo’.

Welcome to a place where words matter. On Medium, smart voices and original ideas take center stage - with no ads in sight. Watch
Follow all the topics you care about, and we’ll deliver the best stories for you to your homepage and inbox. Explore
Get unlimited access to the best stories on Medium — and support writers while you’re at it. Just $5/month. Upgrade