I was terrified of my bullying ex-wife and one of her most annoying habits was deliberately putting me in lose/lose situations. But I had an annoying habit of my own when faced with lose/lose situations: PROCRASTINATION!
For example, in our charming, french town-house, there was an alcove at the top of the stairs and she wanted me to build a wardrobe to use the space. You’re probably thinking that sounds like a good idea and what a great use of space, so where’s the harm in that? But there was one tiny problem: I absolutely suck at woodwork and thus I had 2 unenviable options:
A) Agree to do the work, make an utter hash of it and wait in dread for the explosion to occur: the screaming, the shouting, threats and occasional violence, it made me utterly miserable and emasculated me.
B) Suggest we delegate the job to a carpenter, in which case, she would have put on her disappointed face, before reminding me of my male friends on a pedestal, you know, the heroic ones who buy their wives a different gift every day, who do 50% of the household chores and childcare whilst earning a 6-figure salary and who never forget anyone’s birthday, or anniversary. These were real men of course, the sort of blokes who take themselves out of their comfort zones to improve themselves (SUCH a shame that I lacked the courage to do so) … and then, following these helpful comparisons, an epic explosion would occur with all the usual…
