Why don’t we take women’s pain seriously?
Nikki Black

My husband has cancer. Leukemia to be specific. He has experienced pain in his joints so bad that he describes ‘seeing’ in technicolor and his ear lobes felt as if they were on fire. I’ve had oncologists tell me cancer doesn’t hurt which I know is utter bullshit. This man had never had an advil until diagnosis. His doctor in palliative care has been more than helpful, and gets angry when he hears of other medical professionals describing an illness that they don’t have and will hopefully never experience. We’ve done everything from diet changes to acupuncture, to meditation and PT. Sometimes nothing else works but the shitty strong stuff. Pain changes you. It changes how you treat others and your ability to work and love and raise your children. People that deny that experience are idiots, and as his advocate I won’t put up with it. Thank god (most days) his wife takes no shit from these people. As for myself, my cramps most months require 2 days of just ‘dealing’ with it. As menopause approaches, I’m terrified. I’m sorry Nikki, you’ve had a rotten time, and if you need me to yell at any doctors, I’m up for it. xo

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