A friend recently told me a story about his current employment situation. It did two things in my mind…on one hand encouraged me and the other hand was terrified.

Let me explain, the encouraged hand was giving me a pat on the back because I don’t THINK I’m like this boss my friend was describing. This boss approached conflict passive aggressively, only asked questions to get you to his perspective, and ruled over his employees with an IRON fist.

The other HAND was punching me in the face. Which I am so grateful for. The terror hit me, am I this boss? In what was am I this boss? Do I communicate expectations clearly to my employees? Do I attempt to understand others before forcing others to understand me?

Surrounding a dinner table somewhere…would people stand up for me at a table or would they throw me under the bus. Does my treatment of those I work with encourage unity or am I oblivious to the discontentment in my employees. You might outrank someone… it doesn’t justify a mistreatment of your colleagues.

A different…good friend of mine said something at the beginning of this week that really hit home. Here is a DEEP paraphrase.

When I heard what you were saying…I had to stop and ask myself how it applies to me… what can I glean from this… do I do this…

I think he’s on to something. Something that I’ve been writing and ranting about for a while which is this. You can’t change or control others. You need to take responsibility for your own actions. Seek to refine and audit yourself constantly so you do not push away the very people you need. Constantly strive to communicate clearer and more effectively daily.

You will see the fruit in your work, team, and family.

(View each colleague as a partner, view your family as teammates… it won’t eliminate friction, but it will remind you that you want the same outcome)