“…but he’s a good guy…”
If that’s so, then show me one who isn’t?
You know when you hear that from someone you wonder what is the foundation of this judgement, maybe even the motive? Is it some kind of patronizing comment, or a genuine compliment? WTF? Often I’m left wondering any number of things: tell me something I don’t know. Or, is there something I missed about this character? Do folks just use this expression because they feel badly that the individual is really an asshole, a real buffoon?
Been there, done that.
I’ve been a Buffoon; I know it. I’ve also been told I’m a “good guy”. I wonder what shortcomings must I make up for in order to be classified as a “good guy”? More than likely there are times in which I am not such a “good guy”. To my surprise, suddenly reports prove that, in fact, I am a “good guy”. Fuck ’em. Judging one’s character based solely on first impression is not always accurate. Still, judgemental, intolerant, narrow minded thinkers can go fuck themselves as far as I’m concerned.
Who cares about the “good guy”?
I am, and have been by business associates, friends, peers, classified as a “good guy”. Sure, it is flattering. But, no matter if I were good or off my game I know who I am and don’t need to be reminded. Let the talking heads keep their vocal vetting commentary to themselves; assholes. Whoops, I am being one myself. There you have it; good guy gone. A relapse. Please…take your judgement and fuck off.
But really the long and short of it is we are all good but at times, and we all have buttons that can be pushed enough to change our behavior. It happens in our networking too. Is he or she vetted? It seems as though he or she is good, but worth the risk? But let’s not go by the word on the street. Instead go directly to the word of the individual. Actions and execution speak volumes. This I do everyday. So thoughts and judgements get passed around but we are the keeper of guise or disguise (to be seen as good or not). It is representation. My team and I at Mosedale Integrated Solutions strive to represent as “good guys” as much as genuinely as possible.
If you represent you don’t have to live up to the broadcast
At times, it can be easy for any of us to beat ourselves up. We think one thing Is not right or one thing we are not good at etc., etc. This can damage the ‘good guy’ image. But really? It can build up and shadow our true selves. It can mask the goodness. Who is that good guy? How did we get classified this way? Again were we bad or no good at one time? Well yea, except when things aren’t going his way or he gets insulted or put down. It can emulate ‘asshole’ activity. Argggg. But chasing it up to retain and interface — I exercise the Ghandi model, peaceful interpretation of my surroundings.
Recently my son was upset about some complicated frustrating bicycle mechanics he was trying to work through. The stand fell, he mumbled, “I’m not a good mechanic”…and more… It was loud and frankly not good. Regardless, he is, in fact, a good guy. I don’t have to remind him of this I know. He doesn’t want to hear it either. My suggestion was to say, ‘Hey Ethan, the stand fell crash boom, look at it like a joke.’ Jeez what more could happen? Hey son it’s just a crash boom bam. Ha Ha, crash boom bam, a dramatic part of a crazy escapade that is beyond your control. Kinda funny, eh? Dude just giggle, and remember it could be worse. Shrug and laugh it off. Set up the bike stand. Make a funny theater piece out of it and channel that anger energy into a humorous reflection. This is the Gandhi piece; the introspective of looking at things beyond your control and dealing with them.
As I finish thoughts on “good guys”, I know what or whomever says I am a good guy is beyond my control. My actions may or may not be related. Business performance and character pervade. Let naysayers go ahead and tease, complain, critique, I am who I am. I am proud, happy and lucky everyday. My true friends and family don’t ever compartmentalize me or my business as good, evil or indifferent — they just know. Those are the people to keep close.