What do I really want from life?
So I guess you could say that this year hasn’t exactly gone to plan.
What was the plan? Oh you know, just to roll on to the stage at graduation, fall into a ridiculously well-paying graduate PR role, and turn into a big deal at a young age. Travel the world, be a good footballer, do all the things I’d set out to do. Because that was realistic to do in a space of 10 odd months…
Well, truth be told. It wasn’t really ever like that. But it was meant to be something like that. Something more stable anyway.
The year has turned into some-what of a forced gap year. Working casually here and there in a job I don’t like. Putting my finger in all sorts of pies to get myself the exposure and experience I feel I need to take the next steps in life. Both professionally and personally.
So yeah ok, it hasn’t been exactly how I’d hoped. It’s been kind of rough at times actually. But, it’s taught me more than I could have imagined.
1. Life is never as simple as you think it should be.
This is a true statement. But, it’s actually a good thing. I’m learning things this year I didn’t think I’d have to learn. Like resilience, persistence and pure grind. This is probably one of the first times when the silver platter isn’t placed in front of me. This is where I have finally had the realisation that you actually need to go get it. You want to succeed? That isn’t passed to you, or bought, or simply bestowed upon you.
2. You never, ever stop learning.
This is only as true as you want it to be. You never stop learning and developing. I firmly believe this. It doesn’t matter if I’m talking about my professional journey, my personal journey or any of the confusing shit that comes in between in this crazy life. I’ve made shit decisions before, said dumb things, made monumental stuff ups, but you learn. You learn from what you do, and you learn how to deal with the consequences of what you do. I can’t work out if it’s scary or exciting that this is something that will never stop. The day it does, you may as well stop. Or retire somewhere with heaps of money and cool shit…..
3. People change and people aren’t always good.
I am as neutral as they come. If we all dressed up like a country of the world or state of America like they did on the Simpsons, I’d be standing next to Ralph Wiggum in his cut out mattress dressed as Switzerland. I’ve written before that I will always see the good in every person. But beyond that, you’re a total space cadet if you don’t think people can be sheer a**holes. You need to learn to protect yourself, because sometimes, people either have it wrong, or are just plain and simple out to get you. It’s rare. But, it happens. Stay sharp and you’ll be sweet.
4. Stay humble.
This can be my down fall. I like to talk. I spent years learning how to promote things. I’m a thing. So naturally, if you want to go around telling everyone everything, it can go down the wrong way. I’m certainly not somebody who has their head in the clouds, but I’ve learnt to stay humble. It’s sometimes a lot nicer to surprise someone rather than to shove information in their face. This is a philosophy I use both professionally and personally. If people want to find something out, you’ll know. Be available, but don’t be everywhere.
So I guess when I think more into what I actually want from life, the more I want to place less and less expectation on myself. That isn’t a negative, I have absolutely no doubt I can succeed on many occasions and I will achieve some cool things (sorry, humble). But what is to be considered as successful and an achievement needs to be decided by myself. Self-satisfaction is the best sort of achievement. Being happy and fulfilled with where I’m at in life.
I remember back at uni, when the bog standard first tutorial would always be asking where you want to be in 2, 5 and 10 years. Well I can’t even tell you where I’m going to be in 6 months, and I’m pretty comfortable with that. That’s actually pretty exciting.
The summer is looking adventurous. I’m off across the country doing what I love. I’m still striving for that big professional break. I’m still just taking it day by day and as long as that continues with the support of those around me, it’ll be all sweet.