Responding to Hate with Hate will never work, as you already so elequently wrote.
“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.”
― Martin Luther King Jr.
It is so easy to respond with Hate when facing hate that it must be a conscious choice to respond in any other way. If it were easy, everyone would do it by instinct.
Although being an older, white, hetrosexual, married male with a life and upbringing that tends toward the Judeo-Christian background and world view, I don’t face the trolls attacking me personally as many others do every day. I suppose I should try harder.