Networking Is a Lifestyle — And Sometimes Comes With Travel Perks

Angela Skowronek
Jul 20, 2017 · 5 min read

As a natural introvert, I was always flippant about networking when I was younger. The very thought of my career success depending on how well I could work a room of strangers filled me with dread, so I convinced myself I didn’t need it. “After all,” I thought, “who would hire someone based on the quality of their small talk?” Surely my resume would speak for itself, I reasoned — my merits on paper would put me far ahead of my extroverted counterparts who were putting their faith in networking, no doubt.

However, once networking got me an all-expenses-paid, week-long tour of Tokyo and free lodging in a furnished, high-rise apartment in Rome, I started to think differently.

I embarked on a solo backpacking trip after college, and one morning, I found myself in the lobby of a quaint guesthouse on a lake in Myanmar, wishing I had companions to share the cost and experience of an all-day boat tour with.

After half an hour of waiting and hoping to meet a fellow traveler to join me, I resigned myself to simply enjoying the lake from the shore — until I was almost knocked over by a 40-something Italian couple rushing out the door, shouting to each other about a barca. Something deep in my brain knew that word meant boat. I also knew that if I let my introvert side win and didn’t follow them, I would be missing out on the boat tour, the entire reason people visit this town. So I bit the bullet and I ran after them.

My two Italian friends and I enjoying a beautiful day out on the lake in Myanmar.

My two welcoming companions and I became fast, if unlikely, friends after a beautiful day spent touring the lake, visiting local markets and lunching with our boatman. Over dinner that evening, we talked about where we were headed next. Upon hearing I planned to visit Tokyo in a few weeks, one insisted I connect with his Japanese friend there, promising that she would show me the best of the city. Not to be outdone, the other offered me a free place to stay at the high-rise condo building he owns in Rome, next time I happened to be out that way — “Bring anyone you want, and stay as long as you like!”

So although I haven’t made it to Rome yet, I did meet up with the friend in Tokyo, and she showed me its marvels from a local’s perspective. I got to have experiences the typical traveler never would on their own —hidden ma-and-pa food shops with some of the best fare the city has to offer, a friend of hers who let us cut the line at Tokyo Skytree, and a cousin who gave us a personal tour of the psychedelic fashion world of Harajuku. On top of it all, she refused to let me pay for even a single drink or train ticket throughout the entire week. She told me she’d do anything for a friend of our mutual friend, the Italian, who had helped her get settled when she lived in Italy in her twenties.

The view that my new friend treated me to: Tokyo from 450 meters up.

After that heartwarming display of kindness and hospitality, it clicked. I had the experience of a lifetime because I (accidentally) “networked.” Networking is simply the cultivation of productive relationships, and although I wasn’t seeking to get anything more than a split boat fare, I gained. I broke out of my shell to meet two selfless, adventurous travelers who made my stint in Myanmar what it was, simply because of their gregarious company. And, because I didn’t think of it as networking, I was my naturally friendly, curious, amicable self instead of a sweaty, nervous, uptight networker, and we were able to form a genuine connection that would affect other experiences in my life in a positive way.

Since then, I’ve been shown the power of networking time and time again. I scored an amazing job with a company I’d had my eye on because someone I did volunteer work with had a sister who worked there. My brother found an amazing apartment near the beach for an outlandishly low price because he befriended an elderly neighbor where he used to live, and her son was the landlord of the beach condos. A former coworker of mine got a sponsored visa and an incredible job with an Australian company simply because some Aussies he met in a restaurant while on vacation there took a liking to him.

Now I get it. It’s the word that’s scary. It’s the thought of how much of your life and career rides on “networking” that’s scary. In the end, the key is to live a lifestyle of networking. It doesn’t mean foisting business cards on unsuspecting strangers, or grilling people you meet about the connections they may have. It simply means being friendly and amiable towards everyone you meet, from the person sitting next to you on the plane to the people you meet in your hotel lobby.

I’m not suggesting you should live always wondering what someone can do for you, either; the world is a nicer place when people are friendly to each other, and genuine friendliness will endear people to you. So when someone has a job opening or a second ticket to somewhere amazing or a beach house they’re not using next month, they’re going to think of the people they enjoy being around, the people who were genuinely open and friendly to them when there was nothing to gain.

At the very least, you’ll get positive karma and a good feeling out of it. And at the most? Meeting the right person could change your life. So don’t let the word “networking” psych you out. Train yourself to be friendly and genuine in all situations, and see how the story unfolds.

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