Hallelujah—In Praise of Babel
with apologies to Leonard Cohen
Update 1: Now available in audio courtesy of the brilliant Shawn Wang
Update 2: This is now the official song of Babel.js!
I heard there was a clever trick
That rewrote all your JavaScript
But you don’t really care for magic, do you
Well it goes like this: the source, the dist
The ES five, the ES six
The sacred script transforming Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
So I added all the shiny things
Classes, spreads and template strings
Through syntax sugared code I tried to woo you
Generators, const and let
I used them all without regret
And it’s a terse and a destructured Hallelujah
Hallelujah etc.
Well my faith was strong but I needed proof
The standard was my source of truth
But TC39 meant nothing to you
So even though you weren’t impressed
I checked the build against the spec
And it’s a more-or-less compliant Hallelujah
Hallelujah etc.
You say the build step’s too complex
And you claim no need for ES Next
Well I used to think that way before I knew you
But your code grows older with each line
It’s a joyless dirge on a withered vine
It’s a threnody for a bygone Hallelujah
Hallelujah etc.
Yes I learned about the danger signs
How they’d polyfilled a thousand lines
The cost of using Maps and Symbols threw you
Still I disregarded common sense
Now my source is small but the build’s immense
And it’s a slow and unresponsive Hallelujah
Hallelujah etc.
There was a time when they let me know
What’s really going on below
But now there’s only source maps there to school you
And debugging’s not a progress march
It’s a frenzied fumble in the dark
It’s a labyrinthine search for Hallelujah
Hallelujah etc.
Well, maybe there’s a god up there
But all I ever got from prayers
Was broken builds and errors that would spook you
And the anguished cry that you hear at night
Is the plugin I forgot to write
It’s a cold and it’s a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah etc.
Here’s Cohen’s original lyrics for comparison…
I heard there was a secret chord
That David played and it pleased the lord
But you don’t really care for music, do you
Well it goes like this the fourth, the fifth
The minor fall and the major lift
The baffled king composing hallelujah
Well your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you
She tied you to her kitchen chair
She broke your throne and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the hallelujah
Baby I’ve been here before
I’ve seen this room and I’ve walked this floor
I used to live alone before I knew you
I’ve seen your flag on the marble arch
But love is not a victory march
It’s a cold and it’s a broken hallelujah
Well there was a time when you let me know
What’s really going on below
But now you never show that to me do you
But remember when I moved in you
And the holy dove was moving too
And every breath we drew was hallelujah
Well, maybe there’s a god above
But all I’ve ever learned from love
Was how to shoot somebody who outdrew you
It’s not a cry that you hear at night
It’s not somebody who’s seen the light
It’s a cold and it’s a broken hallelujah
You say I took the name in vain
I don’t even know the name
But if I did, well really, what’s it to you?
There’s a blaze of light
In every word
It doesn’t matter which you heard
The holy or the broken Hallelujah
I did my best, it wasn’t much
I couldn’t feel, so I tried to touch
I’ve told the truth, I didn’t come to fool you
And even though
It all went wrong
I’ll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah
