Ascertain
So many people all around me
I want to push, why?
So many lies all around me
I want to hide, why?
So many fake faces all around me,
I want to punch, why?
Things could have been better
But I made them worse
Friends could have been all around me
But I’m sitting alone
Memes could have brought me a smile
But I’m writing this line
Why?
I picture myself sitting beside the window
Wind blowing near my ears
Clouds holding tears
Birds escaping the claws of night
But now I can’t see the light
No one is invited in this mansion
Why do people still arrive?
Once I wanted blank space in my life
But that doesn’t mean no one beside
Don’t want anyone to know me
Cause that will hurt me eventually
Reading all these lines,
Feels like I’m psychopath
No…
I got no problem with the people
The only person that annoys me
Is the person in the mirror
I kept on asking not to expect from me
That will make you uncomfortable
That’s the only thing making me vulnerable
I always tell everybody to be yourself
But I know, I myself am someone else inside!
Kept the expectation bar so high
Fell hundred times cause I lie
Deadline for the craft was yesterday
But it’s still in the draft phase
Smile for a moment
Now getting sad after reading your comments
I used to sleep with the smile on the face
Now getting behind in the race
Happiness was always beside me
Now expectation is all around me
Bliss saw this happening
She up and left
You can call me a cheater
But give it a second thought before you say it
You don’t know what I’m dealing with
How could you know when doors were closed
I’m afraid to open
Cause you will be left frozen
That’s the reason I’m trying to write this poem
I’m not the one who will put a knife around the wrist
Just to see what’s there inside
If you don’t care
No need to take a glimpse
I have been through a lot
Just don’t know how to express it to people
But please do not think that I can’t
What’s your definition of depression
You don’t need to lecture me
Why are you so close to me
I told you to stay away from me
I made you a song
You made me a mess
I heard these lines will replace you
Haven’t you heard, I no longer need you
Inside the mirror, there was a man he used to be
I no longer need to see
I don’t want to see your face
I don’t want to see your fake face
My life is not something to gamble with
You are the one I gabble with
You always ask me
“Why are you sick with your pen”
“Why don’t you talk with your friend”
You really don’t understand what it does to me
Sitting quietly with my friends
Lot of things going inside my head
It’s hard to tell what’s inside my head
Why should I sit around the people who don’t care what they are doing
Why should I sit around the people who don’t love what they are doing
Why should I sit around the people who always nod their head as if they agree
Why should I sit around the people who doesn’t challenge me
I don’t take advice from the people who doesn’t listen to mine
I don’t care what are you doing till you come inside my line
There is this lesson learned
No more paper to be burned
I hope that you sleep now
Prey for you to choke now
I don’t want you in my life anymore
Won’t let you win this war anymore
I want to dedicate this to my friend who was smiling beside me
When I was on the ground, NO!
I want to dedicate this to my girl who was busy saying her own stuff
When I was stressed, NO!
I want to dedicate this to me who was standing alongside
When I was about to fall!