A Perfect Relationship: Everyone Have Their Own Grail, So Do I

Photo by Caleb Ekeroth on Unsplash

The more I think about a relationship that would satisfy me 100%, the more often the word “friendship” occur to me.

However, in the century of women’s rights being restored (and I think it can be called so), the more attention is given to the partnership in relationships.

But what is partnership, in simple terms? To my mind, partnership is about making certain rules in the relations of two people rather than their equality.

“I support you, you support me.” “If I have a tough day, you’ll help me with something.” “You can rely on me.” “We’ll talk and solve the problem.”

And so on. Partnership is healthy relations full of responsibility. And I respect it.

But in fact, partnership is rather a game with its rules as well as total abidance by them. I perfectly understand people who appreciate this type of relationships, but I also listen to myself: partnership burdens me. It makes me put myself in a thousand of bounds, nice and golden though they may be.

You see, no matter how beautiful the life you have chosen is — if it deprives you of inner freedom, it deprives you of the taste of life. To me, freedom is everything. I understand people who talk that once you try freedom, try a healthy relationship, you won’t consent to anything else. So I gave up on partnership which appeals to everybody so much. It doesn’t works for me: facing bounds and agreements, I feel like I’m in chains, which are against me, which means they won’t bring any happiness to my partner either. In other words, whatever I encounter in my life, it’s no option for me to agree to chains of partnership because of fears.

At some moment I was lucky. I acted wisely: I decided to rely on the things I’d loved since the very childhood. They are the basis of life for me. These things are love and friendship. Suddenly for myself, I realized that when there were both in relationships, it no longer needed to be corrected.

A relationship is in no need of showdowns.

No need of infinite partnership conversations.

Because me and my partner are friends. Friends who trust each other. Friends who are always sincerely glad for each other. Friends who will at once tell the truth and give a piece of sincere advice.

Such relationships don’t need a set of rules and agreements. They are not only light and pleasant for their naturalness — people feel calm due to the sincerity of both. And love in such relationships gives strength and a desire to help the partner as soon as there occurs a problem.

The main thing is not to lie to yourself at the beginning of a relationship and honestly answer the questions:

“Is this person a friend to me as much as I to him (her)?”
“Does friendship mean the same for both of us?”
“Do we both love each other?”

I wish you a relationship which will satisfy you 100%. Don’t put up with a scratchy sweater, biting remarks of your partner and the unspoken rules of socio — enjoy your life now, not some fine day.