I Was a Teenage Autogynephile
Amanda Roman

Amanda, you asked if anyone reading this could ‘see themselves reflected in it’ (your story)? Well….I do. At least the first part. I remember looking at the girls in school (from elementary on up) and thinking not how I though they were fun or attractive, but how much I liked what they were wearing. This never went away. I would eventually cross dress (my sister’s clothes did the trick) and thought it would eventually go away as I became attracted to girls. And I did become attracted to them, but I still wanted to BE one of them. I am older than you, and I didn’t have the vocabulary. I had NO idea what I was experiencing. I was a freakshow. Or so I thought. I was ashamed. I swore that no one would ever find out.

I would later marry and have kids…but it never left. This was more than cross-dressing, but there was a sexual component to it-that you speak of. The though that I was simply sexually attracted to either the clothing or being a woman. After years of this battle, I have come around to identifying as Transgender. Yes, it was around since I was little. And all of our paths are different, yet we do have some similarities in our stories. I know that the media has their ‘ideal trans person’ in mind and that it often does not fit ‘us’. No matter. We move forward.

Thank you for your story.


Show your support

Clapping shows how much you appreciated Anna Guy’s story.