AFFIRMATIONS DISASTER: “Wanna change your life? Affirm and visualize anything that you want in your life. I got impressed with the self-help book and tried it, funnily..
Affirmation 1: TODAY IS THE HAPPIEST AND THE LUCKIEST DAY OF MY LIFE. “Shit, shit, I woke up late…..damn my mobile alarm!! Ugggh…..all my clothes are un-ironed…..where did I keep my comb?”

Affirmation 2: I AM A CALM AND RELAXED PERSON. “Taxi! Taxi! Bullshit…..Stop, idiot. Positive, positive…..I will get a cab in the next two minutes, no, 30 seconds…..and punch in at work at 8:59.”

Affirmation 3: A WINDFALL OF MONEY WILL COME TO ME TODAY. I AM A MONEY MAGNET. “No, no, not another red light!! The cab meter is Rs.80 already…..I will not have money to eat today…..”

Affirmation 4: I AM DISCIPILINED ABOUT MY DIET AND EXERCISE. “ Oooh, cake…..fuck the rest….”

Affirmation 5: I HAVE AN EXCEPTIONALLY HIGH METABOLIC RATE. I STAY 55 KGS NO MATTER WHAT I EAT. “ I like you very much…..just the way you are……and I will join the gym on the 1st.”

Affirmation 6: I HAVE UNLIMITED POWER AND ENERGY. “Bloody lift!! Four flights of stairs…..huff puff…..oh, unluckiest day of my life!”

Affirmation 7: EVERYDAY, IN EVERYWAY, I’M GETTING BETTER AND BETTER. “Candy Crush level 160 done. Odus didn’t fall down once. In your face, yesterday me!”

Affirmation 8: IT IS A VERY ROMANTIC DAY TODAY. “Annesha, your Jeevansathi is just a click away!!….Choose from these 10 people!”

Affirmation 9: I AM A POISED, ELEGANT, BEAUTIFUL LADY. “ Shit hair, stay in place. Look IRONED. Why did I wear green? Is the shopgirl staring at my chipped nailpolish? Jackass a…..e, staring at me…..”

Affirmation 10: I AM TRAVELLING TO TEN NEW PLACES THIS YEAR! “Grocery shop, Big Bazaar, Mani Square mall, Tripoto’s website, emergency Grocery shop visit again, , Facebook, ooh, Park Street with friends!! Yay!”

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