The Traveler I Thought I Would Be (and Who I Actually Am)
The words we use to describe ourselves and others carry a lot of weight when it comes to our expectations. Identifying as a traveler influenced how I spent my time abroad, but it didn’t quite match what I truly wanted and needed.
Leaving my job and Copenhagen meant shedding the identity of a corporate worker living in a big city. In the weeks before I left, I began to picture myself as a traveler. What would I do? What kind of a traveler would I be?
This is what I envisioned:
- Immersing myself in the culture of the countries I’d visit. Learning the language, diving into history through books, tours and museums, and trying to understand each place deeply.
- Being very social, connecting with locals through platforms like Couchsurfing and Workaway, enjoying living and working alongside them.
- Challenging myself with long hikes, bike rides, and wild adventures into unknown places, embracing nature and outdoor experiences.
- Going with the flow, carrying a light backpack, frequently move to new places and letting things happen naturally, inspired by Rolf Potts’ “Vagabonding” philosophy.
But I soon realized this kind of travel didn’t come naturally to me. I did some of those things, but mostly, I craved time alone. At first, it was hard to accept. Had I traveled across the Atlantic just to be by myself?
Following my Longing to Go Inside Instead of Outside
Things changed two months into my trip when I was in Peru, amidst the bustling tourist spots near Machu Picchu. Even though I enjoyed the hikes, nature and getting to know the culture, my mind kept going back to the quiet Brazilian island I had just left behind. I daydreamed about how I could go there and just do nothing for a while. After three weeks, I followed my gut and flew back to Brazil. This was the exactly right decision for me. I ended up staying in this place for three months until my expired visa forced me to leave!
In Danish, there’s a term called ‘udlængsel’ (out-longing) to describe a desire to go out or away. Initially, I thought that was my longing, why else would I leave home? But I quickly realized my yearning was more of an ‘indlængsel’ (in-longing), a need for introspection, peace, stillness, and contemplation — all the things I found hard to access in my daily life in Copenhagen.
Embracing the Kind of ‘Traveler’ You Are
Now, I don’t introduce myself as a traveler anymore. I say I’m on a sabbatical, which feels more in line with how I’m spending my time. I do things I enjoy, for myself. I read, learn, exercise, write, and explore local places at my own pace. I travel slowly and spend a lot longer time in the places I visit than most travelers do.
What I’ve learned is that travelers are diverse. We have different intentions and reasons for traveling. Being around other travelers made me see this diversity clearly. The key is to embrace your unique journey and allow you to be yourself. No matter what other travelers prefer or what you imagined before you left.
If you’re curious about this topic, you might enjoy my article about the various types of travelers I’ve met or my piece on people leaving Western lifestyles to become nomads.
