Sometimes it’s not awesome. Sometimes you’re lonely. The important thing to remember in this case is the benefits you ultimately get out of non-monogamy as a choice and to take steps to try and handle that loneliness. Steps that acknowledge and recognise your feelings rather than shoving a grin on your face and trying to feel okay with it all. Because eventually, if our partners aren’t spending enough time with us for us to be happy, we won’t actually be able to realise that if we’re trying our best to not be unhappy and lying to ourselves about it.
…ike my indifference to my partner’s romantic exploits made me heartless and even somehow ‘jealous’. And in fact, listening to details of my partner’s exploits stood my hair on end — not because I was jealous or bothered — but because the fear that I would become jealous was so intense it made me just as uncomfortable as jealousy would — maybe even MORE uncomfortable. I would only realise later that my discomfort in being a voyeur had a lot to do with the sexual abu…