How I became a top writer on Medium in 3 trillion categories
Kristen Pyszczyk
1K10

Before I read this article, I was like every other wannabe writer on Medium. Sucky. Sad. Pathetic. Weeping into my bowl of Frosted Flakes. Exactly like that.

BUT NOW I have read. And Now I See. I See and I Understand. I Capitalize Words Randomly to Emphasize My Writing Enlightenment.

In the 30 seconds since I finished reading This Article, I quickly wrote and published 17 articles about my particular areas of expertise, which are (in no particular order)

  • The durability scale of donuts
  • Top procrastination techniques for dog walkers
  • Failing as a parent: It’s not you, it’s your kids
  • Monochromatic wardrobes and you
  • Netflix Nights™
  • Ways to eat leftover pizza without feeling sad about your life
  • Shabby-shabby home decor

Since then, in the 30 seconds following the publication of said 17 articles, I received 12 emails from the Medium Editorgovernanceship informing me of my awesomeness as a writer. That’s the power of Writing Enlightenment. We have Transcended.

Let the Words Rain Down Like Soft Soft Snow. Or like rain, I guess.