No Good Excuses for Male Emotional Stuntedness:

An Incomplete List

A sadboi tattoo;

A career;

Being obsessed with the National;

Being a sjw;

Having cried once while watching the opening sequence to “Up”;

A beard;

A PhD;

Foals;

Being an Aquarius;

Having been to therapy once;

Being gay;

A sense of humour;

Having owned a dog;

Sort of knowing the difference between a vulva and a vagina;

Any number of cats;

Having gone down on a woman once;

Knowing who Judith Butler is;

Owning a plant;

Knowing who Michel Foucault is;

Having seen a pube;

Having called own mother once;

Mommy issues;

Being poor;

Daddy issues;

Being a dad;

Being a comedian;

Being rich;

Being attractive;

Not being attractive enough;

A septum piercing;

Being a minority;

Alcoholism;

Owning a musical instrument;

Cocaine;

Having watched Twin Peaks;

An opinion about Twin Peaks;

Having been heartbroken;

Having read a book;

Being a leftist;

Being European;

Having mentioned period once of own accord;

Being a writer;

Being an artist;

Being a woman.