Matching Underwear

I started wearing matching underwear sixteen years ago, when I went to work in the operating room. I found myself getting changed in a locker room full of other women twice a day and suddenly ‘people’ were seeing my undies. Not just my husband (I was married at the time).

Oddly enough, it was all those women — women with whom I would never have sex, let it be noted — who inspired me to up my underwear game. I suppose everyone wants to dress nice in front of their peers. The women in the locker room had every imaginable underwear combination from granny panties to g-strings to commando. It was a real eye opener for a sheltered ICU nurse like myself.

They don’t mention this stuff in the interview process. No one told me that switching my career from ICU nurse to OR nurse would not only change my personality and give me the ability to hold my own in a swearing contest with a Navy SEAL, but also compel me to express my individuality in my choice of under garments. I suppose because in the operating room, everyone dresses the same on the outside.

Over the years, I left the operating room and returned to it. But the matching undies obession stayed. In fact, when I go underwear shopping, I take it as a sign from The Heavens if I find matching bra and panties in my size. The Powers That Be most surely want for me to have this. It’s simply destiny. Who am I to disagree with the Universe?