The Moment I Accepted I Will Never Win Miss Congeniality
It took me a very long time to realize I don’t have to like everyone. To actually give myself permission to let go of that shit. From a very early age humans, especially women, are trained up to be polite and to attempt with every fiber of their being to tolerate and be nice to others.
Don’t get me wrong, I pour love out where ever I can.
And it’s a big but. I don’t expect to like everyone who crosses my path these days. And I don’t beat myself up about it. I expect there are a lot of people out there who won’t find me to their tastes. I’m ok with that. However, it has taken me decades to decide it’s ok for me to harbor those same emotions towards other humans.
Ironic, isn’t it? Another case where you hold yourself to a higher standard than you do the people around you. Sometimes there will be people who will simply rub you the wrong way. No matter how hard you try, it is not going to work. You can keep attempting to make this frustrating exercise pan out. But it’s also alright to say ‘Fuck them and the horse they rode in.’ And walk away from the energy suck of trying to like someone completely unlikeable.
Humans are imperfect beings. You will mesh and click and be fiercely loved by some people and it will be magic. You will also — sometimes for reasons you may not ever understand — just never hit it off with someone. You don’t have to. Life isn’t a popularity contest.
If you show up as your Real Self, no one can hold it against you. If you are honest about your feelings, even when they are icky, no one can hold that against you either. You don’t have to like a specific person to be able to love everyone.
Acceptance. Authenticity. Armor. Don’t leave home without them.