New beginnings are often disguised as a painful endings- Lao Tsu
Enough is enough!
I am not doing this to myself any more!!
This has to stop!!
It’s the moment when everything in your life has hit a dead end and all is dead, from your emotions to your very own being. Nothing seems to be working out right whatsoever you try, you are exhausted from the empty life you have been living, the mistakes that you have been making, tired of even life itself!! The moment you drag yourself out of bed with no enthusiasm of facing the day with absolutely nothing to look forward to. It is at this moment when it dawns on you that if nothing ever changes you are worse than dead!!!
I have reached my dead end and i tell you, it takes courage to accept that everything that is you is wrong!!..It takes courage to dare venture into a new life a new beginning with no certainty of the outcome, even thinking about it scares the creeps out of you. What if it doesn’t work out? What if it turns out worse than now? Is it worth the struggle? Is it too late? Can I really change? How will my friends and family react to this? Ooh what if it doesn’t work out? Continues the vicious cycle of questions that can only be answered by trying. Most of us end up giving up on trying life once again because sometimes we are so afraid of change that we keep holding on even though there is nothing left.
Not anymore!! I have to stop existing and start living! It is a bold and scary step I am taking, I don’t know if I can hold on to the end.. all I know is that I have to give it another shot..I have to give myself another chance to experience life again. I’m aware that it will require all of my energy, that its going to be hard, painful even to achieve the kind of life I desire… but what have I to lose? I don’t think it can get worse than this, after all nothing comes easy even the butterfly beautiful as it is goes through many challenging and painful changes to achieve its beauty.
Just like a butterfly struggles out of its cocoon so will i no matter what it takes..even if its the last thing that i will do..i make this promise to myself today ,to be a better me, to give all that I can give, to unleash my potential…..TO LIVE!!