Bitter sweet marking upon my skin

Today my body is faltering between stress, anxiety and excitement
Like being thrown between the pendulum of health and pending indictments 
I can feel the rage inside me twirling towards the edge of the unknown
Yet still having the confidence of complete control over all things shown
No stranger to this place of discontentment more so mused by its persistence
I feel the times they are a changing while I am unable to let go of past woes
gravitating to familiarity even when faced with its predictable foes
situation is never going to be optimal and I never to be your native soul

While time remains our only real asset needing nothing more than our love of it
And gentle men scurry the halls of confusion settling the row between fairies and hobbits 
Nothing would be sweeter now than to know you are well on your way to losing bad habits
I’d gladly give you my share to see your dismissal of matrimonial affairs with “just have it”

I am fighting a battle started by faces I have never seen 
I am walking on nails from the carpenter’s unfinished dreams
I have been blamed for the wars between enemies of your schemes
I am exhausted trying to pretend I am ok to play the next scene

Water under the bridge, let old dogs lay, better off without them
All simplistic salutations we recite for governance lacking foresight 
A lonely bed or breakfast alone instead and no place of comfortable to rest my head
And all my dreams quickly become the sum of all my fears instead
But letting go is not an option so I hold steadfast and now my nails rip my own skin 
All just a cruel reminder, the bitter sweet markings of just how easy love begin.