The Depression Decorum

Apoorva Kumar
Jul 23, 2017 · 5 min read

Chester Bennington

“I came to a point in my life where I was like, ‘I can either just give up and die or I can fight for what I want’ ”

A lot of people loved him.As he was a celebrity a lot of these people shared emotions with him. Celebrity might be a person for himself but for a lot of other people he might be a saviour. If you don’t like anyone around you, or your life, you might savour the character, the art. That’s why people mourn the death of these people. It’s not as fake as it seems on social media.

So What is Depression ? Is it really sadness. Or is it some kind of happiness. I have suffered, So I can talk a little bit about my variant.Depression is not as Dark as other people think it is.

“Depression is sexy”

But of a different kind. At emotional level you are opened to some “chest of thought”, you understand people better, you understand pain better. It’s like a different kind of understanding. Depression might be, due to sadness but it’s not sadness. It’s some kind of deeply satisfying dark happiness. Others don’t understand. You are continuously increasing your distance from things around you. And you enjoy being distant. You don’t like anything like money, fame, any material thing. It’s like a river, you just flow down and down. It’s such an amazing feeling so soothing, I don’t know why people have termed it so heavily with darkness. It’s actually opening to something new. It’s like taking weed and seeing something different from termed reality.Who knows what is real. We consider ourself logical,It is a great sarcasm, because who we have termed reality as this is because it’s more continuous and we spend more time in it. I might think weed is a way to come back to life(I don’t take one) from this virtual reality.

You know Depression gives you a different outlook of a life. It gives you a lot, if you don’t have something to cheer. But what makes it beautiful, makes it addictive.

Get out of my head,Get out.Infestation,twisting my thought into a dark hideous slithering .(copied)

“Depression is Addictive and Dangerous”

These things which makes it sexy as hell makes it damn addictive. You would like to sleep all day cherishing those thoughts which are just flowing. It is as beautiful as any other addictive shit. Believe me Depression is lot about addiction without any hangover. Now why it’s Dangerous. Because it’s addictive(LOL). No Because it takes you to an inevitable conclusion. ‘Death is an end of everything’, In everything, there is pain,and day to day struggle as well. In everything there is negativity and uncouth stress.At this point it becomes dangerous(even though I don’t agree),Because it leads you to an inevitable action, Suicide. If you embrace, ‘Thanatos’ is waiting for you but if you don’t embrace and fight alone against your untermed addiction. And there is a lot of chance you will lose. This is a place where you need , help is required, because you are so convinced that “death is a lot more beautiful than life”.Is it ?(Controversial ).

Believe me when you don’t embrace it’s hellishly dark.

Like a wet kiss,She asks for surrender.Like a soft whisper,She seduces.(copied)

“The logical reasoning behind depression”

I think it’s all stimulus and loneliness. But if I refine my words I would say a long withdrawal after a drunken night. Trigger for withdrawal or depression is a short term happiness after a long term loneliness(My specific trigger). Mind creates this stimulus, I think some harmonal induced logics and emotions. Like a lot other. It’s an amalgam of harmones and situation.

You are a celebrity

Like a celebrity there a lot of people around you who unknowingly share some bonds with you. I went to a ceremonial march for a suicidal boy.There I saw how everyone even people like me who never saw that man, were connected as a common conscience. Most don’t have the caliber to show some genuine emotions. They don’t have the finesse. You are never lonely, you just don’t know what a connection is or how to make one. If you want to blame other for your situation. They are just average people Even I learned to make friends the hard way. My stimulus turned out to be humour. That’s how I make friend. A lot of people care about you believe me.(controversial) But does this matter if you follow individual point of strategy. So does this matter. No it doesn’t. So what really matters. To give. Giving is something which is most peaceful thing unlike happiness which is exhilirating.

“Give the world something to cheer. Take revenge for your loneliness in a constructive way.This is your renaissance”

“Depression makes you selfish”. You think just about yourself.(Is this bad.Controversial).

I will die, and with me the weight of intolerable universe.(copied)

Long live everybody.(controversial)

Find something that is more addictive than depression(curiosity ??).

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