AI-powered surrealist writing
Experimenting with an AI copywriting assistant
Yesterday, amongst other irrelevant posts, intrusive ads and pointless photos populating my Facebook feed, I was force-fed an ad for an “AI-powered copywriting assistant for e-commerce.” It promised to help me “go from blank to brilliant in under 6 seconds.” I’d normally scroll right past it but as I’m always on the lookout for new ways to generate surreal or random writing, it got my attention. So I thought I’d give it a whirl.
I quickly signed up and there I was, ready to go from blank to brilliant. On the website, there is a set of options to choose from depending on your needs, but as the tool is still in beta, “Product Copy” is the only one currently available. Jolly good! Let’s see how it can help me promote my hypothetical “products.”
All there is to do is write a product name and description — manually or by inputting a URL from which it extracts the most relevant sentences — and then it generates copy suggestions. Easy enough, right?
I used my own writing as the base material for the experiment and it didn’t disappoint!
Lactating bears
I picked one of my texts at random, enigmatically titled “Lactating bears,” and filled the description with a passage from it.
Then, I hit the “Compose” button and AI-powered magic happened.
Ten suggestions were generated in a few seconds. The first few were rather bland and uninspiring:
“This bear is just too cute. 😂”
“These are so adorable!”
“We love them so much!”
No.
The fourth one, however, was something different…
Good Lord! Where did that come from? What happened to the cute bears?
Better stay away from those bears, and do not, under any circumstances, hug them, especially when they’re lactating. Jeez!
Let’s see what else it had in store for me…
“You can never have enough of these bears. They are so adorable. 😂”
Lactating bears are the best.
“This is what you need to know about lactation in the wild. 👌”
Feeling adventurous, huh?
“When will we get back from this trip? We have no idea what we’re going to do next, but one thing is certain: I’m not taking any more time off until after I’ve finished writing this!”
I want some time off, now.
“If you’re looking for some inspiration for your own personal space, here are some great ideas you can try out right now!”
Ok.
“It’s not just bears, but also dolphins who are lactating. They have been doing so since prehistoric times, as evidenced by their fossil records.”
Who would have thought!
“A group of lactating bears is making its way through Europe with the help of animal rights activists. See their progress here.”
Shout out to animal rights activists for supporting a noble cause.
Well, some of these were great! Let’s keep going.
The tool also lets you specify a keyword that it will try to incorporate into the suggestions. So I randomly picked the word “mammal” from my text and magic happened once again.
Mammals don’t half-arse lactation.
What else?
“A lactating mammal is one with its own distinct identity.”
Unmistakably so.
“We’re not mammals, but these lactating bears are definitely mammals.”
Definitely.
Ok, let’s try it with another keyword, shall we?
Thief.
“A lactating bear thief stole our hearts!”
How could you resist?
And another.
Bleakness.
“When you’re lactating, you can’t help but notice how much more bleak things are around you.”
Too much bleakness to handle.
Plough the earth
Next, I tried inputting the URL to “Plough the earth”, another one of my texts, impatient to see what “most relevant sentences” it would extract from it.
Yeah, all very relevant.
The first suggestion wasn’t that exciting.
“The land is too big for us, so we will plough it.”
So here come the keywords to the rescue:
- Litter
- Stolen joy
- Wound
Things got a bit more exciting.
“It’s litter time!”
Yay! The kids love litter time! 🎉
“Before stealing joy, ask for its litter.”
Have some manners, joy thief.
And next, my favourite…
I suppose it depends on how much you’re into wounds, but if you’re really into wounds, then a wounded one is way better than no wound at all. Fact.
Hello routine
I gave it another go with “Hello routine”.
The original suggestions were somehow funny.
“Hello, my name is Bob. I’m sorry to disturb you, but I have some important news about our friend and colleague, Mr. Bob Dylan…”
Hello Bob.
“Hello, stranger. Sign language interpreter here. I’m sorry to disturb you. But I have something very important to tell you…”
Hello sign language interpreter.
And then with the keywords.
Surgical.
“A surgical reminder that we are all part of the same species.”
Pass me the scalpel.
And another one.
Disembowelment.
It was nice to see you too.
“Disemboweling the body is not the only way to make it look good.”
Frankly, I don’t see any other way.
Bonus
I kept going for a while with a few different texts and got a couple more gems in the process.
“The gold drips from its blackened eyelid in a slow, steady stream that lingers in the nostrils until it settles in the throat.”
“Latency is the name of the game.”
“No broom? No problem!”
“This will make you feel like you’ve been hit by a stray bullet or thrown into a volcano at 30,000 feet!”
“Jade is a great medium to explore how we perceive smell.”
“It’s not always easy being green! But these people have found ways around it. And they do it by using their own body as part of the solution!”
“Indigenous balladry is not dead yet.”
“Skin flakes from the abandoned ukulele.”
“This is what you get when your best friend goes to jail for being gay.”
“The new album is called “Sodding,” but it sounds like an ode to the joy of being alone with your thoughts while you wait for someone else’s arrival — or, if you’re me, when they arrive — to make their presence known.”
“The only thing more annoying than the garniture is the silence.”
“Jabbing at the wind with his jabberwocky stick.”
“The world is full of strange creatures. Some are beautiful, some ugly, some downright bizarre. But all share one thing — they’re just plain weird.”
“Zoot suit or not, we all need our zoot suit.”
“If you’ve ever wanted to hear someone else talk about how much they hate you, this is for you!”
“There is no escape from escapism.”
That’s all folks. This was good fun.
References
All of these wonderful suggestions were brought to you with the help of Keywee, the AI-powered copywriting assistant for e-commerce. Give it a try.
And you can read all the texts used for the experiment on my website:
