A Loving Mindful Attentive Empathic Parent Is like cultivating a colorful garden

A new book by Alison Gopnik, “The Gardener and the Carpenter” What New Science of Child development tells us about the Relationship between Parents and Children,” is an affirmation of the kind of parent I was and still am to Todd, now 33 and Samara, 26.

My question, is it really so much of a challenge to be loving, supportive, calm, caring and a tuned in parent? Is it that scary to let your children take the lead? What I mean by that is our children by way of our tuned in attuned empathic connection show us who they are, right off the bat. Our challenge as a new parent is to be flexible, open and go with the ebb and flow. Quite the challenge! As the author of “What Do You Expect? She’s A Teenager! Sourcebook My Aerial, Mindful Approach, coming from a place of calm and love, taking a step back, rising above is a very ABC course, a direction that truly works. Just meet Todd and Samara, they are the testimonials: They are humane, kind, bright big hearted adults who connect beautifully with children.

Samara adores children, has taught children in a pre-k in Manhattan for 4 years and taught middle school in Israel. Samara is like a children’s magnet. They are drawn to her love, and her wanting to make a big difference in their lives. She is full of Awwww’s when she sees a child anywhere. She is so ready and willing to connect at any random moment. Children are so aware and smart. They know an authentic caring person when they see them. It’s very much like that with me and my work with kid, teens and young adults. They have intuitive radar!

I loved Alison’s metaphor to planting and cultivating a garden. Do you notice that your garden and plants grow better when you Love talk and listen to them? My Physical therapist, Nanda, originally from Holland, is all about her Garden and her two sons aged 14 and 16. She gets it big time. Such a nurturing woman who is all about her son’s health safety and welfare. Sounds like me. We have THE best talks when I’m on her table.

Firstly empathically, with TLC and big smiles connecting Lovingly and Mindfully with your precious self, is a great place to start. Listen to yourself. Be attentive. We often give such great advice, do we hear it for ourselves? Anyway, once there, then approach your child with the same TLC. and big smiles. Our children respond beautifully to this approach. It calms them down when they are ramped up. It’s great Role Modelling for them to learn how to Self Soothe. Laughter is the big leveler as well.

Having been there, as a parent and with your precious children as a psychotherapist, I so have your backs, for those of you that are parents and Millennials that are considering taking the plunge. I’d love to hear your stories, narratives and give you, as a Life Coach, facilitator and guardian angel some empathic direction.

Namaste always in Peace:)D