to be alone.. am on my menopausal stage maybe.. but come to think of it why do i felt alone. when i born my son my first child at the age of 26 i woke up alone in the middle of the hallway of the hospital naked only a small blanket i have in my body.. waiting for my husband for he has my dress. What can i expect for a public hospital.. i felt alone then they cannot found my husband. After a minute there he is he don’t recognized me then. I don;t have a relatives or mother that would take care of me coz of some personal issue they hated me that time. what reason? i choose a wrong man. But for i love him that much on that time i choose him. another story that someday i will write. After giving birth no permanent place to stay. after a day am all alone taking care of my son. I still don’t know how but instinct of a mother learning was too easy then. On my second child its a different way i have my best friend with me. I only have 2 children and they grow so fast.. My son was 23 years old and my daughter was 17 years old now. At my age right now i felt alone again. My husband was choose to be with another family of him. But, there are times that you would like to have companions. Companions in every day that will caress you. Especially in the days that i don’t understand what i fell.Maybe a sign of menopausal period. A time or a night that would you like to have someone to talk with.Am keep on asking am i not worth to love too.. so my husband that i fought on my family before have choose to live with another woman .. anyway, younger than me.. what can i do..??? Alone alone..am keep on asking do i will be alone for the rest of my life. do i would fell happiness again. Am happy with my children but they have their own life. they are making their own path of life. am just here for them to guide and provide what they need. I love them and i did my best to be a mother. Some how life will give me an answer. For now i keep on moving and struggling for life.
Soneday i will write my life and post it. for now i will write what i felt.
Alone…
arnie