In his book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, Mark Manson defines Good values as 1) reality-based, 2) socially constructive, and 3) immediate and controllable.
Bad values are 1) superstitious, 2) socially destructive, and 3) non-immediate or controllable.
Some examples of good values are honesty, creativity, humility, standing up for oneself, self-respect, vulnerability, curiosity, and charity.
On the other hand, dominance through manipulation or violence, indiscriminate fucking, feeling good all the time, not being alone, being liked by everybody, being rich for the sake of being rich, and racism are bad values.
Manson says good values are usually internalized, like you can experience humility right now. But bad values, e.g., popularity, rely on external factors. Consider taking responsibility vs. blaming.
For example, you want to be the most popular one at school. First, it’s not in your control; second, it’s not reality-based. You may feel popular or unpopular when in reality you have no idea what others think of you. Moreover, bad values may require socially destructive and superstitious ways to be achieved.
Conclusion:
Values are about prioritization. The value you prioritize affects your decision-making and actions. When you choose bad values, you decide to care about things that don’t even matter. But when you prioritize good values, you choose better things to care about, things that make your life better, improve the state of your well-being, and bring you happiness. This is what self-improvement is about.
When you choose better things to care about, you choose better problems, and when you choose better problems, you choose a better life.
Thanks for reading!
