An otherwise happily married couple's squabble over how much social media is ok for their almost teenage daughter. (Raya , the crazy one in this picture )

14 years and many differences if opinions later we call ours a strong. marriage with each of us bringing our own logic to the table to be able to eventually after a few nicks and blows resolve the situation and live happily ever after.

But this dilemma plagues our household like never before because that the center of this dilemma lies the most cherished thing to both my wife Divya and I which is our 11 year old daughter Raya.

Now Raya wants to be a rockstar and is preparing hard for this and of course wants validation from friends and family so she loves to record the funniest vdos and musically and in order to

  1. Hone her craft
  2. 2. Get feedback
  3. 3. Validation of her proof of concept like we call it in the business world

And I think that’s just fine , but here is where the situation gets difficult , Divya who is obviously a protective and concerned mother does not want Raya to be part of this new generation that gets its self worth from the number of likes and is fearful about being trolled by strangers .

Now I get that and I want to look out for her well being and safety as much as anybody else but it’s like going trekking with the kids or diving or fostering dogs from unknown backgrounds every passion you follow comes with risks and we have to be careful at all times , so how is social media any different .

Raya goes with me for all my speaking engagements where I’m training coaching individuals and corporations on how to leverage musically and snapchst for the success of their own business , she is right there as she helps shoot the #askaviarya show and helps with the editing , so the next obvious question she asks me is that when over 650 people at a time pay and come to listen to you help their brands through social media why can’t u as my dad allow me to do what you know is awesome for my social media.

I agree with Raya and assure her the right time is almost here and meanwhile she is in training as an apprentice with me. And I then after a long day of speaking at such conferences with my Raya in the audience filming , I come back home and as I lay in bed I run these conversations between Raya and I with Divya .

I mean if your girl gets a chance to perform at the world largest stadium along side Beyoncé on Monday would you turn down that oppurtunity ? I guess not right. So what’s so different about her trying to reach and create a community and find her feet by social validation which is so much a part of every human beings needs growing up and beyond.

In fact I often find adults more vulnerable to emotional roller coaster rides once we assume they are all grown up and parents aren’t looking over their shoulders and they end up having ….

Here your kids love with you and you are allowed to monitor their every move guide them and help them create the legacy they want instead of leaving it to them once they are 18 just because you think they are now grown up and are ok to do stuff ..

Our kids till they even reach age 60 and you may be 90 will still be kids for us and we will fear for their well being.

So rayas journey to becoming a you tube star will happen regardless of differences of opinion that Divya and I have on the timing of this issue , however in the end I’m greatful and I hope Raya grows up and reads this post one day and realized whatever the case may be she had two loving parents whose only intention was to ensure we keep Raya safe happy and on her way to finding and excelling in her passion. Love you Raya.


Gary Vaynerchuk people owe their success to their parents I owe a big part to this man.
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