DECLARATION OF WAR
Declaring that a state of war exists between self (including my heart and soul) and the combined aggressors of weakness, low morale, laziness, low self-esteem, lack of desire, lack of effort, unemployment, less experience, ignorance and misinformation and making provision to prosecute the same.
Whereas the belligerents mentioned above have committed repeated acts of war against myself, my loved ones and my free will and have fully resolved to bring about my utter humiliation, complete destruction and hamper my personal and professional growth; Therefore it be resolved by myself and my allies, that the state of war between me and the above mentioned combined belligerents which has thus been thrust upon me and my allies is hereby formally declared; and that I and my allies are hereby, authorized to direct and deploy the entire stock of elite weapons including (but not restricted to) my willpower, endurance, mental strength, stamina, knowledge, networking, contacts, emotional intelligence, learning, education, communication, ambition, technical skills, entrepreneurial skills, talent, hard-work and others to carry on war against the aggressors mentioned above; and to bring the conflict to a successful termination. I hereby pledge the full deployment of all resources mentioned above in my favor.
I, Me, myself