This was what broke it for me. I became homeless because of a difficult situation that was out of my control and needed desperately help from the church, and I asked and asked. I got an immense amount of prayer and good wishes and “declaring” things over me, but no one was able to say “hey, we have a couch we can let you sleep in for a couple of nights, we can help you”.
The people that helped me weren’t Christians (or if they were, they were the poorest ones, the ones that were barely managing and struggling themselves).
And despite things were not my fault I got told I was in the wrong, that I was a train wreck and how did I dare be such a person and a Christian. I must change and repent and be good. I got told countless times God wasn’t helping me because I didn’t have enough faith or I wasn’t doing exactly what God wanted me to (but when I asked what it was, no one could tell me what it was exactly or how to fix myself so that God would like me again according to their words). If they did reply, it was to suit their needs, “do this for me, do that for x person”.
And I am also frustrated by how much it seems like a business rather than a place to worship, to be human, to commune. Or like going to a concert.
I couldn’t help but nod at almost every single sentence over and over and go yes, that’s it, or yes that’s me. I am down for it, and I am a train wreck and I mess up over and over, but still I go.