I recently read Leslie Rasmussen’s letter in support of her friend Brock Turner, here’s my response…

Read Leslie Rasmussen’s letter here-

It was with great sadness that I read the letters of support for Brock Turner by his father and childhood friend and the horrible situation that he created for himself. It came as a huge shock to me.

I don’t know the victim, but I’ve had peers since elementary school and friends very close to me for years through middle school and high school. I’ve had friends who have been respectful, admirable and well liked by everyone. I’ve had friends who are the star of the class and that gets by in life as the most popular person around. But I know to never be surprised by the actions of people that I think I know well. And I know now, even more so, to never be surprised or shocked by the actions of people who take a stand in the media in support of someone who clearly crossed the line of doing what is right and wrong-whether the majority believes it was rape, assault, fun or getting some action.

It’s pretty frustrating to see the light that people are putting him in now. That he’s a ‘swim star’ or ‘all-american’ while the true victim continues to bear the weight of being nameless, an unconscious woman. I cannot believe it. I’ve thought about it a lot, and from different angles. I tried to accept that maybe this woman was in some way dishonest, that she had over elaborated, I’ve tried to accept that maybe Turner didn’t mean to do any of this, but I just couldn’t imagine that was the case. I know rape is a very sensitive subject, for everyone, and especially women. There is a chance that Brock went out that night with no intention of rape on his mind. He may have went to a party and drank, like almost every student at a university does, and was flirting with a girl like he said. There’s a chance that the victim left her house that night with no intention of being raped, right? Shouldn’t that be a standard comfort most women hold with them as they live their life. She may have went to a party and drank, like almost every student at a university and was flirting or talking to a guy. The woman recalls how much alcohol she drank, which was a lot. She was no doubt about to black out if not already, which I can relate to-hello 21st birthday. I’m so glad that I never have had to go through the ‘misunderstanding’ of being forcefully violated behind a dumpster. It doesn’t take rocket science to know that someone who is blacked out and incoherent should be protected and safe, not just free game for a someone who may or may not have been attempting rape just because his feelings and emotions were increased because of alcohol.

I don’t think it’s fair as a woman in the Bay Area to jeopardize my safety, the safety of other women on the Stanford campus and the mental safety of the victim by giving Turner a slap on the wrist because we don’t want to hurt his feelings or jeopardize his future. Where do we draw the line and stop worrying about being politically correct in every second of the day and see that rape on campus is constantly played down and shoved under the rug. Where do we draw the line stop worrying about being politically correct in every second of the day and see that victims of sexual assault and rape don’t feel the support of the justice system that is supposed to protect them, that don’t feel the support of the academic community that is supposed to help them feel safe. Where do we draw the line so a woman attending Columbia doesn’t have to drag a mattress to the stage to accept her diploma just to have her voice heard? Where do we draw the line to stop minimizing rape? There’s a reason there isn’t an in-between word for someone who takes advantage of a girl on campus and someone who kidnaps and rapes someone who was walking to their car. There isn’t an in-between because the act is all the same. Whether the motive is different or not, there is a moment, an eclipse of a second where if you have any moral high ground, any sense of right and wrong, you don’t pull the dress over a girls head whose as a limp as a puppet. I think it’s disgusting and I am so sick of hearing these people use alcohol and binge drinking as an excuse for 20-somethings thrown into camp-like university environments to behave in a completely inappropriate and sadistic way. Idiot boys and girls have to much to drink and are not aware of their surrounding, with clouded judgement every day, every hour. But when does it come the new norm, the status quo to just expect maybe waking up on a gurney after being found by a dumpster exposed and violated. I guess it becomes normal now, in this midst of all this.

I’m happy that Leslie Rasmussen knows for a fact that Brock isn’t one of those people that wouldn’t take advantage of a young woman. It is such a relief that that she knows for a fact that he is respectful, respectful enough to help a girl up whose fallen to the ground, right? I really hope that one day my own daughter can find a man respectful enough that his first extinct when intoxicated is to grope her breasts, jab his fingers inside her and hump her half naked unconscious body. If only, what a gentleman. No, I hope one day my own daughter finds a man that is respectful enough to know the difference between right and wrong, intoxicated or not. I hope I have a son who is brought up learning good morals and is strong enough in his convictions to know that a hard on doesn’t mean relinquishing any sense of humanity just to get “20 minutes of action.” I hope I have a son one day who knows the value of a scholarship and how precious that is and isn’t willing to throw that away for “20 minutes of action.” I hope I have a son one day who knows even when inebriated that the gut feeling in his stomach when he sees a woman too drunk to make her own decisions is that feeling of being raised as a gentleman, and that feeling means to walk away, stumble away. I hope I have a daughter one day who can go to a party, go to a school, go outside her door and not have the fear of being assaulted whenever a boy can’t make responsible decision when drinking. I hope my daughter never feels the damage of feeling out of control and diminished by a coward “swim star”, his father, his friends and the judge whose supposed to aid in guiding this obscene situation to some sort of justice.

Attached, here’s a photo of Brock not smiling, because guess what-a huge, loving smile doesn’t dismiss you of your crimes. A huge, loving smile doesn’t take away the grief and anguish that Turner’s victim will carry with her forever. A huge, loving smile can be worn by anyone. A huge, loving smile doesn’t mean anything when it’s worn by someone capable of the gut wrenching actions that took place in January 2015.

Oh, and big thanks to Mr. Turner for including a list of Brock’s favorite snacks in the midst of all this rape talk. It’s super important and pertinent to know that Brock’s appetite is just not up to snuff. On the bright side, at least we all know what to be sending to Brock to make him feel right at home while he’s enjoying his 6 months behind bars.