Pandemic Strolls with My Daughter — Wild turkeys roam the streets of Cambridge. Sure, this was true pre-pandemic. There have always been bands of turkeys in upscale neighborhoods—where the tree-to-building ratio is more amenable to wildlife—occasionally stopping traffic and becoming increasingly skittish as Thanksgiving approaches. But now they seem to have broadened their horizons just as…

That Time My Dad Hallucinated Before My Wedding — I was washing the dishes after breakfast when Courtney called to me from the porch. “Alex, come here quick!” I ventured outside to find my mom and future mother-in-law Gail, standing by the table, alarmed, asking my dad if he was alright. “I’m fine,” dad said, rising precariously, like a…

A Guide for Appropriate Worship (of Me) — You may enter. Don’t look directly at me. Keep your gaze low, near the hem of my bejeweled robe. Try not to stare. There might be a lot of light reflecting off of the jewels. Try not to squint. Neither stare, nor squint. Your expression should be something between confusion…

How to Get Rich Very, Very Slowly I’d heard the rumors. Medium is the perfect platform for freelancers! My brother-in-law’s friend got like a gazillion views and even more dollars on his first post! And it was a list! About the kinds of lists that generate the most views! It…

A different spin on dad bods. — On the cusp of fatherhood you’ll be subjected to a torrent of unsolicited advice. Luckily for us fathers-to-be, we don’t have to carry around the evidence of our impending child in the form of a swallowed bowling ball at all times, so we’re generally safe in public (unless of course…

Can Capitalism and Buddhism Serve the Same Goals? — According to Buddhism, the root cause of suffering is desire. It is also the root foundation of capitalism, an economic system that relies upon the unquenchable needs of its populace. If we all collectively decided that we had enough, whether it be clothes, cars, or corporations, the system would collapse…

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How I came to grips with my size (or lackthereof) — The most crushing moment of my middle school experience, a time when crushing moments seem to queue restlessly, occurred in health class. A couple friends and I had gotten our hands on the black book the girls had been passing around the hallways, which listed every boy in our grade…

On revelation and replication — Slaughterhouse-Five was one of the seminal reading experiences of my life. I read it in 2008—consumed it, really—while living in Vietnam as an English teacher. Every morning I went to a coffee stand near my apartment to sit on a plastic chair and read Vonnegut, the pages of the book…