Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton offend some members of the smart crowd. He rejects free trade (sometimes), foreign adventures (sometimes), and yells about minorities instead of quoting statistics from The Bell Curve. She hasn’t promised to bomb Russia or Iran.

And, so, the principled do what they must. Unable to hold their noses to vote for another Clinton, they pledge to write-in Sen. Ben Sasse (R., Neb.). The next President of the United States, my fellow Americans, is the man who penned the Thomas Kinkade of social commentary on his Facebook page.

Another set of principled thinkers puts forward a different candidate: the former Goldman Sacs employee and CIA operative Evan McMullin.

The unfortunate truth is that Sasse and McCullin are not alternatives for the people that will vote for Trump. Feaver, Inboden, and Kristol make no attempt with their #NeverTrump candidates. The only people who will cast their ballots for them are the kind that hate Ted Cruz and can’t stomach Hillary Clinton. The two men are alternatives to Hillary Clinton qua candidate of the status quo. A major premise of Trump’s campaign is his outsider aura. The Senator from Nebraska and the man from Wall-Street/Langley hold insider positions within the American state as high as one can get.

The small issue of polling remains. To wit, Gary Johnson, the Libertarian third-party candidate is currently beating Harambe (RIP) in Texas by only one percentage point. Anyhoo, best of luck to the both of them, and may the odds ever be in their favor.