Giao and I took photos and interviewed for his film series, The Mesmerism. You can find a link to The Mesmerism at the end of this article.
[how did you find filmmaking] How did filmmaking find me? Years ago, my dad bought me a camera for Christmas when I was borrowing my uncle’s camera. I shot a video that is probably still my dad’s favorite. It’s about a kid dealing with depression. I applied to Chapman University Dodge College of Film and Media Arts.
I was in this phase of taking pictures and learning, as I was trying to bring my theatre background into my film knowledge.
None of my friends knew how to shoot film or expose photos so I was the camera guy. It wasn’t until my freshman year of college when I was in my first play at SPU that I realized the film side of acting made sense.
I wrote some scenes, used my filmmaking knowledge, and combined them. And started pumping out a lot more narrative works. I like to think I’m a simple person. But when it comes to my little place in the universe, when can I have things be the way I want them to be? Film is my place where I can have as much control as I want. So, I can write stories that I really care about and I wished more people cared about.
[what is The Mesmerism, as a whole?] The Mesmerism is a short film series, made for social media about the tales of the youth.
[why social media] It was invented for the advent of Instagram having video capabilities, and that is why the original first 20 are all exactly 1 minute each. From there it grew. It became a scene study of trying to capture moments that young people feel, conversations about breakups, art, dancing, movement, homework, dreams, drugs, drinking, and everything in between.
[when you are making a short film, what comes first to you?] I don’t start with the message, I’m pretty visual and physical. Usually, it is in characters, images, and some sort of words. From there I stew on it and shoot down bad ideas. I’m a proponent of playing in the rules. For The Mesmerism my rules are. 10 videos per volume, unnamed characters, unnamed locations, and they appear independent until the 10th film
[why are the characters unnamed in this series?] I didn’t want to focus too much on who the characters were, but on the fact that we see ourselves in these characters. It’s not just about the character’s experience, it is about our experience too.
Most of the time when we listen to music we know who is singing, but who is the character in the song?
[is there a theme you want people to get from the messages within The Mesmerism] Volume I was exhibiting life, Volume II was set in the past, not of time but of place, Volume III is interview-esque acting on present issues, Volume IV has to do with the future, not of time but where we are all headed.
Each one of these themes talks about someone going somewhere, or what are we doing from here. All of this forward and upward movement.
If there is one thing I want people to walk away from this is, if these are the tales of the youth, what moment, and or experiences make us human?
[what is an example of that for you? what is a moment that has made you feel human?] I think heartbreak is a big one. Everything in life is scientific to an extent, right? But there are some things you can’t put a number on, things you can only feel if you’ve been there.
As many moments as we all feel, are they new feelings or experiences? Everyone in history has had feelings and emotions like us. I feel that heartbreak is something that makes us human, we’ve all kind of been there.
[looking at future orientation, is that heavy on your mind as you’ve created Volume IV? Not knowing what is next] Yes, I knew for a while from the end of Volume III, there is an illusion to ‘can you imagine a world where people aren’t loving, aren’t caring?’ and my character says, ‘yes I can imagine that’. That is kind of the launch pad to Volume IV.
In The Mesmerism, there have been a number of films regarding relationships, whether it be the first date, finding out what love is, or experiencing a birthday together. There’s also a breakup, an angry breakup, a three-month-ago breakup, and trying to forget someone through drug use.
That is one of the big throughlines of The Mesmerism.
[what do you think is important about knowing someone else?] I think what is important about knowing someone else is that they are also a product of everything that has happened to them. When you wonder about why people are the way they are it’s like, do they know? Or do we kind of see a combination of X, Y, and Z equals this? Whether or not they are aware of that or not is beyond me.
As someone who does a little psycho analyzation of people, an actor myself, and as an interpreter of people, I’m trying to stay aware of all those things. People are nurtured.
[what is something that you would want people to know about the way that you are] One thing that I wish that people would know about the way that I am is the things that I find fun are not just because they make me happy, but because if I don’t do them it will make me sad.
If I’m writing or working on a film or acting I will get that out-of-body experience when I’m done with the film when I’m done making it and working on it.
If you love your day job, it is still work. But for me, it is also because I know I’ll be able to reap the benefits of having done it much more than having not done it.
[what about not being able to do something makes you sad] I think that something has to get you up in the morning. Something has to invigorate the idea of being alive. I try to lean into what images come into my brain. What types of stories and relationships am I trying to tell? It’s not just because I want to, somewhere in my life, there’s something interesting to me, that I want to dig more into that.
[how is art helping you dive into past experiences?] Art, music, acting, painting, those forms of expression are what you live life for. Yes, there are people who view films or theatre as entertainment. For them, that’s their little gateway out of their world to go view that.
For me being invested in that world, in that story, in trying to produce the things I’m trying to see. Those are not just entertainment for me but why life is worth living.
[going back to who you are making these pieces for, relationships, young people, what is a message you are yearning for, from the world?] I lean towards, that I wish the world told more people like myself that it is okay to take up space. That there is an abundance of everything for everyone. I don’t think we are told that enough.
[for you, what would taking up space look like?] I would apologize less. I think that when people apologize and qualify their words and actions, it acknowledges to them that they know that they don’t deserve that time and space. But I do that a lot, I go ‘sorry about that’.
Something about knowing, what you say is valid, your thoughts, and your desires are also valid, and it is okay to pursue them. It’s okay.
[why do you think its bad to say I’m sorry, so often] Sorry isn’t forgiveness. But if you constantly think that you are doing something wrong, it degrades you.
And sometimes there is nothing to be sorry about. There are things that, if it is hugely offensive, you will apologize to receive forgiveness. But there are other instances when, people, including myself at times feel like ‘I don’t deserve to be here’, and it feels like, people are allowing me to be here and I don’t want to waste their time. But you can just be here. Make the choices, be creative, and not have to fight for your place at the table.
[people apologize not because they did something wrong, but because they don’t want to be a waste of space] Or they see themselves as lesser. We’re all about perception, but I have no idea how you see yourself. And you probably don’t know how I view myself either. It’s that awareness of knowing, what do I put out? I call it my double consciousness, that’s why acting is so fun for me. Because you have to be aware, you think to yourself, what does the character want to put out to the world, what does this character think to themselves? What do I want to put out to the world, and what do I want to put out to the world?
[Have there been any big changes to the films that you’ve been happy about?] So, this is the Ocean’s Arrival team, moreso all members came back. Just a plethora of new ideas, interests, and challenges. The ability to just be in rehearsals, working on the script, keeps your mind sharp, and I like to be sharp and working on something as you’re always sharpening the blade.
[do you feel that filmmaking is one of the best things you can be doing?] It's just fun for me, it makes my clock tick.
[is this one of the first things that has made you feel this way] Yeah, I think another part of that is, let me write something impossible, and then we will make it possible. I like making the abstract concrete.
You can find The Mesmerism here: https://www.instagram.com/themesmerism/?next=%2Fmesmerism_official%2F&hl=en
